Jeannel's blog

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2010-11-23T09:35:00.001+08:00

Time

2010-11-13T19:43:00.003+08:00

Lets see... About 3 more weeks till the end of A levels, I really just can't wait.. I survived 7 papers already and I just have 7 papers more... So close, so close.

I guess I'll just start writing down my post-level wishlist now!

Things I want to achieve

Lots of fish game fun with my friends!

Get in touch with my inner Jubeater

Write my stories (VL will be first, followed by AOEW, I miss Ember)

Drivers License

Stay over at my friend's house!

TOUCH MY RIFLE THAT I MISS SO MUCHLY

What else what else what else?!

Things I want to get

NITENDO DSI!

TAMAGOTCHI XD

a hamster?

Neil Gaiman books

THERE IS SO MUCH THAT I WANT RAWR!!

Roses

2010-10-24T21:06:00.002+08:00

Roses

The door rings, the girl opens the door, a boy is standing there, wearing a uniform, its a delivery boy.

He looks at the card and says her name, she replies, he passes the girl a bouquet of flowers. She takes the bouquet, thanks him and closes the door.

It is a bouquet of roses, 10 in all, 3 red, 3 pink, 3 yellow and 1 plastic one. She reads the card.

"To the perfect girl, I give 10 roses.

I will stop loving you when the last one wilts."

She starts crying.

Worst week.

2010-09-29T21:42:00.002+08:00

Ugh, I've just been having the worse week. Not as bad as some people, but still pretty awful.

Alot of things have been happening, and seriously.. I just want it all to end. Everything.

I'm so sick of it all.

I'm sorry.

Fuzzy Wuzzy

2010-09-26T17:27:00.003+08:00

An innocent game of fuzzy wuzzy turns... well. perverse.

We went to visit Abigail at the hospital yesterday, Shawn Kim and I. When we were leaving we started playing the game Fuzzy Wuzzy cause Shawn didn't know how it was played. Somehow, we came up with a sentence like this.

Fuzzy Wuzzy likes Boobie Cheerleading Hookers wearing Boots who Stuffs thier Brassieres with Tissue so it Looks Bigger.

I think our sentence was a little bit longer than this, but I can't remember all of it now. :D

Drawing based on my story Vampire Lovers

WADDAFUCK?

2010-09-05T01:13:00.002+08:00

What. The. Fudge.

You know what, I won't let that ruin my day.

Brother choosing a girl who is not his girlfriend over his sister. =.=

"I sorta kinda asked her to come for your birthday, I feel not right telling her shes not welcomed."

Well maybe you should have ASKED ME FIRST before you went to tell her didn't you.

Seriously, where DO your priorities lie?

Priorities

2010-09-03T12:48:00.001+08:00

Where do your priorities lie?

真的是太过分。我的生日你也要问她来？唯，是我的生日，我只子也不要跟深人过的咯，我要跟我爱的人过，是应位这样我两年前没跟你们过我的生日。你也是，多人多好？废话。

我的心现在真的很苦。你那天让我等你一个小时我都没说什么。咳。

5 shots and a stray

2010-08-31T01:20:00.002+08:00

This is the title of my post, (which you can't see Haha.)

5 shots and a stray, named after one of my groupings in today's training, I was supposed to shoot 12 cards of 5, in my absentmindedness I accidentally shot 6 shots on one of my cards, so my next card was a 5. The grouping was decent though, but yes, with one stray shot which I'm pretty sure was my first shot of the series.

Just another day, the stress of the preliminary exams past not quite behind me, after all, there is still one last paper on Thursday.

Cake for breakfast, a surprise for an old friend (Happy Belated Birthday to Kim). Too much cake, too little people.

But as always, cake is good.

Trip to Ikea, lunch with a discount (thank you Jacinta), bought a set of wooden hangers, it was cheaper than expected. Grabbed Swedish sweets too.

After an hour long trip, I was finally at Safra Yishun Shooting Range, the place I have been avoiding for the last month.. or so.

Maybe it was the rain, or post-exam exhaustion, but I was sleepy. I didn't even remember to bring my jacket and thus had to battle the frigid temperature of the shooting range, thank god I'm a rifler.

My coach had the smile he always wears, friendly, not frightening, or creepy, not at all. Giving him Euros I got in return two gloves, a canvas, rubber and leather one for my left hand, and a cloth and sillicone one for my right, all freshly brought in from Germany. Much cheaper than I would have gotten in Singapore, in that instance, I felt I was scammed for my last glove, darn shipping charges and GST.

Retrieving my rifle from its month of hibernation, I apologised profusely to my husband of close to a year, he was neglected before, but still I felt guilty.

With some difficulty I retrieved my suit and other equipment and mechanically arranged the items at my bay, the actions all too familiar.

My rifle uncased, I checked the air cylinder, 200 bar, just as I left it. Perfect, off to the lane with you.

Wearing my suit pants, I noticed I may have gained a slight bit of weight, gosh darned stress induced munchies. My jacket slipped on without a problem though.

Time to try out my new gloves, pulled on the one for my trigger hand first, you know the expression "fits like a glove"? That is very applicable here. It felt odd, but it would definitely help with my slightly sweaty palms during training. After I squeezed my hand into the other glove I felt like I had just wrapped a cloud tightly around my left hand, it was no doubt comfortable and puffy, but it felt odd nonetheless.

Into position I go, dry firing mode on. Lifting up my rifle I smell the all too familiar scent of gun oil and canvas, taking in a deep breath, I felt the stress leave me. The smell is not pleasant, but definitely not terrible, it was calming, definitely because of the familiarity. Its a scent that makes me think of my past experiences, joy of competitions, having to calm down and focus during competitions and trainings.

Looking through the rear sight I breathe out slowly, take aim, fire.

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End note: Training was o-kay. Groupings weren't bad, alot of good ones, only downside was that I got tired too quickly, exhausted after a mere 60 shots. >.>

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Because of the preliminary exams, I've got a long list of people whose birthday presents I still owe. Oh my.

History

2010-08-28T23:45:00.002+08:00

As much as we all would like to rewrite history, we can't.

The things we've done in the past that we regret, we can't do anything about it, so we live with guilt for the rest of our lives. Sometimes because of this we hurt the ones around us, and we can't help it.

There are mistakes that make us who we are, those which we learn from and help us survive during the course of our lives. However, there are just some mistakes which we have no reason to have made, which do nothing to help us in the future, which only hurts us and the ones around us.

And we can't change anything.

So what do we do? We push it away to the deep dark crevice of our subconsious, always present, but never actually paid attention to.

And once in a while when the memory does surface, we find ourselves wondering, was it worth it? Most of the times its not.

In the end I stand, a broken man.

2010-08-24T20:35:00.003+08:00

Go
by Boys Like Girls

Little change of the heart
Little light in the dark
Little hope that you just might find
Your way up out of here
'Cause you've been hiding for days
Wasted and wasting away
But I got a little hope today
You'll face your fears

Yeah, I know it's not easy
I know that it's hard
Follow the lights to the city

Get up and go
Take a chance and be strong
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
Don't look back; just go
Take a breath, move along
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
You could spend your whole life holding on

Believe the tunnel can end
Believe your body can mend
Yeah, I know you can make it through
'Cause I believe in you
So let's go put up a fight
Let's go make everything all right
Go on take a shot
Go give it all you got

Oh, yeah, I know it's not easy
I know that it's hard
No, it's not always pretty

Get up and go
Take a chance and be strong
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
Don't look back; just go
Take a breath, move along
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
You could spend your whole life holding on

Don't wanna wake up to the telephone ring
Are you sitting down?
I need to tell you something
Enough is enough
You can stop waiting to breathe
And don't wait up for me

Get up and go
Take a chance and be strong
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
Don't look back; just go
Take a breath, move along
Or you could spend your whole life holding on

Get up and go
Take a chance and be strong
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
Don't look back; just go
Take a breath, move along
Or you could spend your whole life holding on
You could spend your whole life holding on
Don't spend your whole life holding on

Mroew

2010-08-20T19:51:00.002+08:00

PRESSURE! I can't stand it. =(

Kitty is a sad little kitty right now, who needs lots of hugs. Booze would be nice too.

I'll be 18 in 16 days! Yay!

Then again, what should I be yay-ing about? My last few birthdays haven't been all that fantastic.

At least this year, if it ends badly, I'd be able to forget it all~ Yay for booze.

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Disappointed.

Ever felt that you've been disappointed? Let down time and time again. I've had that feeling alot over the years, disappointed by unkept promises, disappointed by unmet expectations, disappointed just because you're "unlucky".

Honestly I'm getting quite sick of it.

And yes, I disappoint myself.

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I was feeling really down just now, I just went to read one of Cheng Heng's notes. And it made me smile, laugh even. His notes are always such a joy to read. He's a good, interesting, writer.

Milestones

2010-08-11T00:35:00.002+08:00

Milestones.

11th of Auguest.

One year ago I sent out a message, closing one chapter of my book. One which was filled with pain, anger, sadness, disappointment, yes there were the few bits of happiness.. But still.

This is what happened.

I realised how one sided it was, so I let go, finally realising the pointlessness of hanging on. 1 year 9 months apparently didn't mean anything to him, since on that day, I didn't get a message of acknowledgement of the date, nor was told anything as he went to Sentosa with his friends.

Of course, by then I didn't care all that much anymore. I gave my chances, warnings, everything.

Me: "I think we should just be friends,"

Then, silence.

Took me a while to get over it, it hurts you know, to have your heart shattered like that, to be treated as garbage and then find out you didn't really mean anything at all, not enough to even warrant a reply. I remember lying in bed and crying. I always knew we wouldn't last, and yet, I still loved him, despite all the things he put me through. I thought it would be easy, I thought I had stopped loving, apparently I didn't.

Other people thought I was fine though, I didn't show outwardly that I was broken up, though, there were the few who knew.

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Some people may say two months are short, but that's 8 weeks, almost an entire school term. Within two months, I let go. I trusted, I loved again. Then again, I am a hopeless romantic.

Two months later, a new chapter in my life started. Under the stars, in the garden, on one knee.

"Jeannel, would you be my girlfriend?"
"Yes, of course."

And now, I'm happy.

Its been 10 months since then, of course we've had our problems, our quarrels, I'm sorry for all the things I've done wrong, sorry for hurting you, but I do love you Shawn Bunny, we may not be able to meet, but know that I will be thinking of you.

I love you.

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A year or a lifetime, life's what you make of it.

Prelims

2010-08-09T00:08:00.003+08:00

Prelims are coming.

Oh yay.

Am I prepared for them?

Hell no.

Somebody help me please?

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Really, whats the point of all this?

one door

2010-08-04T20:53:00.002+08:00

When one door closes, many other open.

So true, I am happy with my life now, really, other than the stress of the A levels coming up around the corner..

The people you mix with, the people you hang out with, they all affect how you live and grow. Some suck out all the happiness out of you, and others make you feel happy all the time, and when they leave, the world becomes dark. Its not just for your boyfriend/girlfriends, its for the normal friends as well, don't you ever notice how you're usually always happy with some people, while other friends make you feel sick? I don't mean that you don't like them, its just a feeling.

Would never have been able to feel like this if i hadn't let go.

Best. Decision. Ever.

Oh I just thought of another nickname I had for someone previously, Ugly Turtle/Turto.

Life is confusing. All we can do is keep hanging on! All the way.

So...

2010-07-25T20:57:00.000+08:00

So...

What am I doing?

nicknames

2010-07-16T23:00:00.002+08:00

Nicknames are a way of showing our affection isn't it? We give nicknames to people we're close to, people we love. What are some of the nicknames you've given to the important people/once important people in your life? Here are some of mine. Won't be giving any real names in this post though haha.

I'll try to list it in the most chronological order as possible.

Chunky Butt, Flabby Butt (you seriously don't want to know), Mommy, Mummy, Grandma, Grandpa, Bookworm Romantist Meany Kitty (it was longer, don't remember the full thing anymore), Lish, Iggy, Baby (last two were the same person), Wig, Bun (last two same person), McMilk, Whitey, Fatty, Vampire, Duan Duan(last five are the same person), McBrown, MelMel (last two same peson), Clumsy, Meow-chee (last two same person), Thai Gigglo, Sister(last two same person), Uncle Ho, Uncle Fa, FAther(last two same person), Boss, Hamster, Bitch, Jer, Kor, Dadar, Daddy, Big Kitty, Ah Xiang~, Best Friend (last two same person), Papa, ISOBF, Bunny, Fatty (last three same person), Dog, Dayah Pretty, PhiPhi, Puppy.

I'm pretty sure there were more, but I don't remember most of them now.

2010-07-15T21:24:00.002+08:00

Take your sweet time
by Jesse Mccartney

It isnt a crime to want
A little space to breathe
But you will be fine
The sun again will shine on you
Whatever you do

Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here for you baby
Anytime

Im feeling you pull away
'cause letting go isn't easy for me
But you'll never fly
With someone else's wings, I know
Wherever you go

Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here for you baby
Anytime

I will never stand in your way
Wherever your heart may lead you
I will love you the same
And I will be your comfort every day
Do you hear the words I say?

Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here for you baby

Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here when you change your mind
Take your sweet, sweet time
I will be here for you baby
Anytime

I will be here, for you
I will be here
I.. I will be here...
I will be here......

They gave us two shots to the back of the head

2010-07-14T16:31:00.001+08:00

Hey jeannel get your life on track now, please? Your A levels are on the way. Stop playing your games, stop procrastinating, start studying.

On the bright side, I find it alot easier to get myself off facebook now, kind of because the games I play there are pissing me off!

2010-07-11T22:51:00.002+08:00

When I hug you, all the pain, anger and uncertainty goes away, when I look into your eyes, I know and am certain you're the one I love and want to spend the rest of my life with. I know that you're completely and utterly in love with me, and will be forever.

Eventhough the last 9 months did have some uncertainties, I know that I love you, I am really happy to be yours.

Happy 9 Months bunny. I love you.

Amantium irae amoris integratio est

2010-07-07T20:04:00.002+08:00

Amantium irae amoris integratio est

The quarrels of lovers is the renewal of love. I learnt that before, I say its a painful lesson of love. Though, without arguements, you will never solve your problems, and everything would be kept inside, life would continue to be unhappy, because no effort is made to change it.

So, what is love?

A wise person once told me, if you love a person, you love all their imperfections, their problems. When you love a person, you love them not because their flawless, but because it is all their flaws that make them what they are, and its the "them" that you love.

Another latin phrase would be apt at this point of time.

Amat victoria curam
Victory favours those who take pains.

So please, believe me when I say, I love you.

Amicule, deliciae, num is sum qui mentiar tibi?

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Amicitiae nostrae memoriam spero sempiternam fore

tick tock tick tock

2010-07-05T20:03:00.002+08:00

tick tock goes the close, count down.

I really can't wait till I get done with the A levels.

Though I'm really not sure what I'd be doing after that...

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What do I deserve?

You making as ASS our of yoU and ME all the time?

Me being happy no matter what?

Anger count over the last few days -> pretty damned high.

Its kind of like an alcohol heat spike, when it happens, feelings will spike really high really quickly, after a while, it drops really low, eventually returning to normal...

How much more of my heart would you like to break? Why is it that you have this particular flaw?

Frankly I'm sick and tired of your big show of anger whenever some small little thing happens, and after which it would sometimes die down quickly.. Sometimes. I am so sick of your anger problems, eventhough its not directed to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And to me, god damnit woman, why is it that everytime a little thing goes wrong...... geeze. You really should stop it. Its not healthy at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So, should I tell you about my deep and undying love for you?

clique

2010-07-03T12:15:00.002+08:00

I remember a conversation I had with Golden over a year ago. I was feeling emo about how I felt I couldn't fit in to the school, how everyone in the class had a clique but me. I was depressed.

But you know what?

Since then, I've found my clique, and more. And I love you guys.

Thanks Golden.

2010-06-28T22:39:00.001+08:00

Cemetary Drive by My Chemical Romance.

Nice song. Will write out my thoughts on the song eventually. well not really thoughts, more like, what i thought of when listening to the song ahha.

2010-06-16T01:46:00.000+08:00

CWC bbq was so super fun

love those people, love those kids :)

might post details later, maybe. we had alot of food left. haha

have a polaroid shot on my table now facing me. it looks nice. :)

2010-06-07T22:33:00.002+08:00

Let me just get this out.

W, you didn't know when you had it good.

seriously. two guys being in love with me since last year doesn't lie.

"And then baby, everything went black"

the little things

2010-05-05T21:07:00.003+08:00

You know, its the little things that people do that just tells you that they love you.

No, I am not talking about the type of a love a boyfriend has a girlfriend.

Brotherly love, sisterly love, friend love.

your hand in mine

2010-05-04T19:59:00.002+08:00

Okay, been hooked to this show called your hand in mine, in chinese its 想牵你的手, not sure if its the right "wo" lol. but yeah.

the mom and pop are soo irritating can. =.= just stay out of your kids prvate lives sometimes... sheesh... and when people show you concern, at least accep it =.=

NOOOO AIZHEN! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO MARRY LIQIN!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER WITH FANG KAI T.T I hate fang kai's mother. the beetch.

H2O is the most sweet boy ever aw, zen is a good mom too :) stories about them make me feel happy.

*rant rant rant* lol.

thank god its not me

2010-05-04T19:44:00.001+08:00

Thank God its not me.

'nuff said.

What I want to be...

2010-05-02T12:53:00.003+08:00

I want to be a writer, I want to be a comic artist..

I believe I do have an imagination.. I've written story after story, from primary school till now. Never did I write an expository for my exam, never a descriptive essay, all I wanted to write were the one word essays, (at least in secondary school), it could either go expository or narrative, I always chose narrative, I love telling stories, I love reading, I love writing, I love drawing.

I don't draw well enough to make my own graphic novel, my drawings are probably webcomic worthy, but my humor isn't very varied. A few jokes here and there, but not good enough to start my own webcomic.

I want to be a writer, maybe with a couple of illustrations...

Of course, that would never make me any money... I guess I'm stuck to getting good grades and going into business, just like the other junior pawns in our society...

2010-04-29T20:21:00.003+08:00

I have been seeing people in facebook joining some group in loving memory of some girl who comitted suicide.

okay, i don't know the story, have been trying to find out about it but can't really find anything about it. just know the girl comitted suicide.

well i may sound heartless and all but seriously.

suicide is stupid and should never be an option. its a coward's way out.

and to all those who pity the girl, she took her own life. okay, im sad that things in her life have probably been really bad and all, but taking your own life is the stupidest thing to do.

i mean, just look, over a thousand people joined that group, just tell me you had no one to talk to about your problems.

*gets the flame wall ready*

Dreams

2010-04-23T21:00:00.002+08:00

What do dreams tell you?

It told me that I love you more than anything bunny.

My first dream last night was something about school. Kian Yang was in it. Details of the dream are kinda fuzzy but it pretty much told me maybe I should be more understanding and less annoyed by his actions.

The second dream scared me. It started out pretty alright, like after an event, we took a cab, on our way to somewhere. Apparently the cab driver was not very right in the head and wanted to kidnap and kill us. Some people with guns started shooting at the cab (or the driver) from the front. I'm not sure why you didn't move, maybe you were knocked out or something, but then the bullets were going to hit us and I was pulling you towards me and moving your leg to get it out of the line of fire. I was so scared, but all I wanted was for you to be safe. We got out of the cab and ran away quickly. you were shot in the leg.. I was grazed. I was scared and upset, we ran to a road, I think i was asking for directions to the ambulance, there were people at the road, there was a bus stop too (yes, no one stopped to help) We managed to get into a cab and get to the nearest hospital. Details after that were a wee bit fuzzy. But I remember after that I was sitting with you and asking you "would it have been better if I didn't pull you?" Because technically you weren't in that particular bullets line of fire until I pulled you. You told me "No, it wouldn't have been"

I guess its just trying to tell me that I am very much in love of you, and I don't want anything that I do to ever hurt you, even if I didn't intend it. I love you Shawn. I love you always.

family

2010-04-20T20:42:00.001+08:00

I hate this family

Say that i don't love you?

with all the shit you do to me, how could i?

Irritation

2010-04-16T21:56:00.002+08:00

Irritation.

TAN KIAN YANG I HATE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Its so irritating trying to be friends with you when you don't respond. Like seriously, I don't know what guys are like to their own friends, but you're in a mixed school, and I'M NOT A GUY! You're not supposed to be dao and mean!

So much for love. =.= Seriously, can't take you seriously. Ever.

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O.o... Did I really just waste my time writing about my irritation with my dog?

It seems I did. =.=

Yes, KY is my dog, since Monday. Bad dog >.<

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Dear is with his P6 friends now... Chatting I guess....

Oh, got my PW A level results today, my whole group got A! :D

I think the percentage of As for PW in my school this year is quite low.. So I'm happy. =)

Math Test

2010-04-08T22:20:00.002+08:00

This is what happened for today's math test.

*got the papers*
(this is the conversation between me, theo and dayah)

"This is the test?"
"*sarcastic tone* Yeah, its the test, there are ANSWERS"
"Cannot be la."
"Eh, then where is the test?"
"MAAADAAAAAMM IS THIS THE TEST?"
Madam: "yes"
"WHAT?"
"There are answers!"
"Are you sure?"
Madam: "yes it is"
":O THIS IS THE BEST THING AFTER OPEN BOOK TEST!"

yes. our math test had the answers on it. the numerical ones. not the workings.

*after finishing*
theo: "I think I scored full marks"
me: "same here"

I finished it in like, 10 minutes. lol. i waited so long for the others to be done -.-. i was literally sitting there twiddling my thumbs.

screw them.

2010-04-01T23:12:00.000+08:00

screw them.

im sick and tired of all their nonsense and bullshit.

Come What May

2010-04-01T17:30:00.002+08:00

Come What May
Moulin Rougue Soundtrack

Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Everyday I love you more and more
Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing?
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I Love You, until the end of time

Come what may
Come what may
I will Love You
Until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you

And there's no mountain too high
No river too wide
Sing out this song,
And I'll be there by your side

Storm clouds may gather
And stars may collide
But I Love You, I Love You,
Until the end of time (Until the end of time)

Come what may
Come what may
I will Love You
Until my dying Day

Oh come what may
Come what may
I will Love you (I will love you)

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place...

Come what may
Come what may
I will Love you
Until my dying day

communist

2010-03-30T21:39:00.002+08:00

Screw their unfair, uncaring glory hunting. Instead of thinking of student welfare they rather chase glory they cannot have.

Screw them.

I swear, ACSC does NOT deserve any medals, or even the slightest glory under its current rule.

I refuse to give them any glory until they decide to think first about the students.

Officially On Strike

Kyle XY

2010-03-23T21:51:00.002+08:00

There aren't very many tv shows that I seem to blog about, (movies are not included) but recently I've been hooked on one. Yes. I do watch TV. The name of the show is Kyle XY. And it is AWESOME!

Not going to bother writing a review on it, its just a really nice show which I'm currently hooked on.

Even more amazing, now, My Chemical Romance has competition for my affection of celebrities. After watching Kyle XY, I have recently developed slight fandom for Matt Dallas.

Slight.

But seriously, he has this baby faced kyooteness about him. Maybe its just the acting which gave me the impression. Kyle! *squeal* kyoooote!

I was awoken a couple nights ago and couldn't go back to sleep till 5.30a.m. I turned on the TV, guess who I saw being interviewed on the Rachel Ray Show?

MATT DALLAS!! And he made her a chocolate chip cookie sundae! Can someone say AWW? Adorableness!

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Don't worry baby, I still love you the most.

sad

2010-03-19T21:08:00.001+08:00

I had a really really good post in mind this afternoon, it was to be filled with lots of funny stuff which happened during the day, most of which involving me making fun of Theophilus.

But I'm sad now, so scrap that idea.

2010-02-28T21:34:00.001+08:00

Me: i hate my life
Kian Yang: ....
don't kill yourself
Me: trying not to
Kian Yang: if you do I'll be emo
Me: lol
cause the only one you've ever loved would be gone?
xD
Kian Yang: yup
Me: lol.
thanks needed that laugh
Kian Yang: I weep at your apparent disregard for how I feel

Never thought I'd say this, but I really gotta thank Kian Yang for that much needed chuckle.

Love Titanic!

2010-02-27T23:51:00.003+08:00

I just watched finished Titanic.

I am pretty deressed now.

But its one of my favourite movies of all time.

Poor little masochistic Jeannel.

Yes I was complaining to Kian Yang, he told me to stop watching it, then agreed I was a poor little masochist.

Yes, back to Titanic.

Yes, it is one of my favourite movies of all time.

Because it left an impact on me when I was like, 4 years old.

Might have been because, at that age, I didn't watch that many movies. (This is such a lie, my mom brought me and my bro to Lido theatres plenty of times when we were small)

Then again, I watched it on TV, not the cinema.

The female lead (Winslet was it?) never made much of an impression on me, but since then, Leonardo DiCaprio became one of my favourite actors (I don't have many favourites actually, so that must count for something)

Although, I don't really remember watching any movies with DiCaprio in it after that. But! Everytime I see a poster or board about a movie with Leonardo DiCaprio in it, my mind would instantly tune back to Titanic.

Update: I just realised, Ch 5 cut out a couple of the scenes compared to the last time I saw it (a good, 10 years ago? or more.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I remember having the Titanic soundtrack, and I also remember sitting by the music player singing this song over and over and over again. Pretty sure I was still in Kindergarten at the time.

My Heart Will Go On
By Celine Deon

Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you go on

Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show you go on

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're gone

Love was when I loved you
One true time I hold to
In my life we'll always go on

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

You're here, there's nothing I fear
And I know that my heart will go on
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By The Way, if you haven't already noticed, I love Titanic.

what?

2010-02-27T00:30:00.000+08:00

What am I doing here?

I have nothing to write today..

Rose Coloured Glasses

2010-02-23T20:01:00.002+08:00

Rose Coloured Glasses

Why do you always look through those rose coloured glasses?
Do you not see that they blur your vision?
What you see is an illusion my dear, haven't I told you many times?

I met your friend the other day
The one with the fangs and claws, oh what was his name?
What do you mean he has no fangs and claws?
Its in plain sight can't you see them?
He scratched me the other, it really hurt.
Won't you talk to him about it? This isn't the first time.

What do you mean he's nice?
How could you like such a monster?
Can't you see what he really is? Its plainly obvious!
What do you mean I'm wrong?
Don't you see these scars he inflicted on me?
HES A MONSTER!
Its those rose coloured glasses
Its made you oblivious!
FINE! Don't believe me?
I'll just walk away.

You were hurt by that thing too?
You're sorry you didn't believe me?
Well I can't not say "I told you so"
I will never forgive you for what you did.
But I'll be your friend again
Hey, those rose coloured glasses are cracked slightly.
Maybe thats why you know now.

Ugh, that monster-thing is horrible
What do you mean he's not?
He hurt you!
You gotta be kidding me.
You got those rose coloured glasses fixed.
Aw I give up.

priceless

2010-02-22T21:44:00.002+08:00

*kian yang's priceless shocked face*
KY: ______ is not pathetic
Me: well it is for my dad's line of work.

*then the econs lecture continues*

**************the 2nd part of my post contains reference to the World War, do not read on if you're sensitive about the topic********************************

Me: Kian Yang you Jew.
KY: *starts drawing the Star of David on his hand writing "Jew" there.
Me: *rolls eyes and steals his pen and draws a Swastika* There. Heil Hitler, I kill you.

And Kian Yang does his typical "you stabbed my heart" routine.

Me: Were you really shocked when I told you that?
KY: ... Yes. I was. Because I expected it to be _________ to ___________
Me: Why?
KY: Because of the way you behave
Me: How does the way I act have to do with anything
KY: Its just like, hm. Just seems like _______ to ___________
Me: So you're saying I'm low class la!
KY: No! Just that, the seems like that type.

LOL. Its quite fun to make fun of Kian Yang..

NO hes NOT my friend (yeah right) xD LOL~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Can't remember why but this came up again today.

*poke* I'm bored, ENTERTAIN ME!
Should I tell you about my deep and undying love for you?

2010-02-21T20:47:00.004+08:00

Oh mai. I just saw the funniest comment made by SOMEONE on facebook.

"bitchslappin is the next best thing i do besides shooting"

My first thought "This person can't do very much can she...

Considering how the last few tests (and competitions) she was close to last (and last) among our school people...

Also i'm pretty sure I pwned her before with words...

epiphany

2010-02-20T00:34:00.003+08:00

I just realised, I'm a terrible blogger. No, really. I mean it.

Not to mention the occassional "Ah-Lian" speak.

Ah well. Thats not gonna stop me. This has been alive since 2005 and its gonna stay alive until I say so.

songs

2010-02-19T14:51:00.003+08:00

There were two songs playing into my ears today as I was on the train home from school, they played one after another, in this order. As I was listening to it, I was thinking how much it fit my situation about... I can't remember, half a year ago?

Potential Breakup Song
by Aly and AJ

It took too long
It took too long
It took to long for you to call back
And normally I would just forget that
Except for the fact it was my birthday
My stupid birthday

I played along
I played along
I played along
rolled right off my back
But obviously my armor was cracked
What kind of a boyfriend would forget that?
Who would forget that?

The type of guy who doesn’t see
What he has until she leaves
Don’t let me go
Cause without me, you know you’re lost
Wise up now or pay the cost
Soon you will know

You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
Livin’ with me
You’re not winnin’ till you’re winnin’
Winnin’ me
You’re not gettin’ till you’re gettin’
Gettin’ to me
You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
living for me

This is the potential breakup song
Our album needs just one
Oh baby please
Please tell me

We got along
We got along
We got along until you did that
Now all I want is just my stuff back
Do you get that?
Let me repeat that
I want my stuff back

You can send it in a box
I don’t care just drop it off
I won’t be home
Cause without me, you know you’re lost
Minus you I’m better off
Soon you will know

You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
Livin’ with me
You’re not winnin’ till you’re winnin’
Winnin’ me
You’re not gettin’ till you’re gettin’
Gettin’ to me
You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
living for me

You can try, you can try
You know I know it’d be a lie
Without me you’re gonna die
So you better think clearly, clearly
Before you nearly, nearly
Mess up the situation that your gonna miss dearly, dearly
C’mon

You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
Livin’ with me
You’re not winnin’ till you’re winnin’
Winnin’ me
You’re not gettin’ till you’re gettin’
Gettin’ to me
You’re not livin’ till you’re livin’
living for me

This is the potential breakup song
Our album needs just one
Oh baby please
Please tell me

This is the potential make-up song
please just admit you’re wrong
Which will it be?
Which will it be?
(Then it goes off into a volley of lala-s)

And of course, after that would come this.

Over You
by Daughtry

Now that it's all said and done,
I can't believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down,
Like an old abandoned house.
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath.
I fell too far, was in way too deep.
Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,
Dragged the memories down the hall,
Packed your bags and walked away.
There was nothing I could say.
And when you slammed the front door shut,
A lot of others opened up,
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.
'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.
I should've started running
A long, long time ago.
And I never thought I'd doubt you,
I'm better off without you
More than you, more than you know.
I'm slowly getting closure.
I guess it's really over.
I'm finally getting better.
And now I'm picking up the pieces.
I'm spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together.

Well I'm putting my heart back together,

'Cause I got over you.
Well I got over you.
I got over you.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,
I got over you.

Of course, that song is being said from the person who was dumped's point of view. Of course, I was the one who said it, but most of the song is still applicable.

Don't worry Shawny.. I'm alright love. Just thought I'd post this thing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Met my new Creative Writing Circle juniors yesterday, and I LOVE THEM. BECAUSE THEY ALL HATE TWILIGHT! :D

Also, swim P.E is tiring, but at least I'm still in beginners class so its not too bad.

CNY

2010-02-15T12:29:00.002+08:00

Shawn came over to my house yesterday night after having dinner with his family (yay~)

He gave me my 2nd V day present. Aww... So sweet. He made this heart shape thing out of clay, then the 2nd one he made a "broken" heart with J and S on it and I *heart* U on the back. awww <3 mine!

Anyway he my bro and I played Risk. After a while it got boring and we switched to Monopoly. Ok so my board games are all stacked ontop of a cupboard. My bro brought the chair into the room to bring it down.

Dad: "He needs the chair to bring the Monopoly down?"
Shawn: "No, you need to introduce competition to bring the Monopoly down."

Coooooold joke which people who don't take economics won't understand.

We played Monopoly for a while, then my bro drove him home (with me in the car of course)

He ish bad at directions yup ^.^ Shawn, not my bro lol.

Happy Valentine's Day people, I had one ^.^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I made this chocolate caramel fudge thing last Thursday (stayed up till past 12 to make it, had to wake up at 5.50 to cut it) and brought it to school to give to my friends. CAAAANDYYY

It was very well recieved and everyone said it was nice, (although I got 1 person saying "its nice but too sweet! But if I say its nice its really nice, I just don't have a sweet tooth")

I got a couple of "I'm gonna die of diabetes." HAHA.

And Cheng Heng kept coming back for more fudge. Well I gave him one and told him to wait until i've given the rest out, if I had any left I'll give it to him.

So I smsed Kim and asked if she liked caramel, she said she didn't and could give her piece to Cheng Heng. So when I tell the not-so-micro-Micro..

Micro: "Excellent..."
Me: "But you must share it with Tim."
Micro: "Aw.."
Me: "He needs the fats."
Micro: "True.."

Yep. caaaanddyyyy meow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hidayah, Fizah, Fizah's boyfriend (I still can't remember his name >.<) Shawn and I went out after that.

Shawn: "Hidayah, when are you gonna get one!"
Hidayah: "Ai yah, I got so many want me I just don't want them."

haha. I *hearts* all of them.

I actually kinda didn't expect Fizah's boyfriend to be so young LOL. Hes our age. O_O.
Cause from what I hear when Hidayah and Fizah talk about him, just xpected him to be older.

My first question to him when I saw him: "How old are you?"

rofflemao.

But we had alot of fun. Walked around when waiting for Pizza Hut to call to tell us they already had seats for us. We ate at pizza hut, had alot of fun laughing and making fun of each other. xD

Fizah and Dayah are damn random I tell you. They hear a song and they start dancing. Haha.

Had alot of fun. Love you guys :)

2010-02-04T20:39:00.003+08:00

How long ago was Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone made?

I'm watching it on Okto now.

How technology has improved since then. Haha.

This coming from the person who wants to watch Soylent Green.

Cheng Heng I blame you!!!! LOL.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sad :( I was hoping it was gonna be better than last year.. >.<

darn Chinese New Year.

This is why I don't like festivities. Things just keep happening!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How fitting, just after I posted this, Spongebob appears on the screen and sings "Its the Best Day Ever"

The Irony Gods are now ROTFLMAO-ing now.

Oh Great Ceiling Cat, why have you abandoned me?

shadow penis!

2010-02-03T20:01:00.001+08:00

SHADOW PENIS!

Um, CWC inside joke. LOL. xD

miami ink

2010-01-30T00:25:00.002+08:00

Mai - Eh - Me Eengk.

Ever watched the show miami ink? And la ink? Basically its a show glorifying tatoos. I'm watching it now with my bro. Ok, so the art is really nice and all, but seriously, a show about tattoos? Who was the person who came up with that?

Also, its a bad influence and only shows how our world is going to the dogs. Yes, I am against tattoos. Its not natural, its putting chemicals into your body, which really can't be good for you.

Oh btw, I heard this from one of my juniors (who quit shooting after like 1 year) a few years ago. She watches these shows apparently, and likes it. You know what she told me?

"I want to get a tattoo."

She was not even 12 yet.

THEY SHOULDN'T BE SHOWING THIS SHIT ON TELEVISION!

starting out

2010-01-27T22:49:00.003+08:00

There really is nothing more scarring than seeing theophilus wearing big reddish sunglasses, holding a pistol, and doing a kissy face.

HAHA. I IMPLANTED THAT IMAGE INTO YOUR HEAD! xD

if im going down im taking everyone with me xD

okay im sorry, you can go think of unicorns and bunnies and rainbows now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is what happened in the morning

Principal: "......... MOE has posted 950 students to our school........."
Me: "*sits alert* did I hear right? 950?"
Random person: "950!"
Me: "OH MAI GAWD. I was really excited about the J1s coming, but I'm scared now. T_T"

like seriously, 950?? We had like, less than 800 students in my batch (i think)

the school is going to be SO crowded. Everyone i've talked to today has mentioned about how they won't be able to get seats in the canteen anymore, and I have to agree.

Many also said that they are gonna pack their own food to school, and stay in the base class to eat. good idea.

Breakfast for my Baby

2010-01-24T21:17:00.003+08:00

Breakfast for my Baby~

Well, kinda. I woke up at 9 today, had to go for monthly shoot. My detail was at 3+, but I wanted to go early, like 11 plus. Since I woke up at 9 I decided, hey why not make breakfast for myself then make breakfast for my mom and bro (who were still sleeping) as well as my boyfriend who was shooting (at that point of time)

So out of bed and into the kitchen I went.

Looking around my kitchen, the ingredients I had were eggs, a huge carton of whipping cream which my mom bought to make some dish a couple days ago (it expires in MAY LOL) some cheese, butter, sausage (these which I didnt use)

But there was a problem, we had cake and no bread. All the staple food we had was rice, and who wants to eat rice in the morning?

So I headed down to the minimart to get a loaf of bread.

It was crowded there, they didn't have the usual plain white bread, so I just bought the high fibre white bread of which they were plentiful.

When I returned home, it was breakfast time, so I rolled up my sleeves (figuretively speaking of course) and got to work taking out all the foodstuffs my mom chucked in the oven (mainly cakes and whatnots wrapped in zip-lock bags) then I carried the counter towards the electrical plug and plugged it in.

First of, was my breakfast. I wanted to make egg ramekin, but since I had no ramekins I used a chinese ceramic bowl instead.

Cracking two eggs into the bowl careful to not break the yolks, I added maybe a tablespoon of cream (or more, I just estimated) a little sprinkle of salt and some nutmeg (I randomly rummaged my "spice cabinet" for this, it turned out tasting pretty good) then i placed the bowl into another bowl filled with water and put them in the oven at about 165 degrees celcius for 12 minutes. Kinda think I should have put it in maybe a minute or two less, my eggs came out a teensy bit too cooked. As I ate my breakfast with some bread, I thought "hey this isn't so bad, I actually may be able to cook!" Of course, I kinda got this recipe from Nigella Lawson, but I forgot most parts of that show, so I improvised mostly, only really followed the eggs, cream and heat (which is more than half the dish, w.e DONT JUDGE ME!)

So, now it was breakfast for the others. I went online to get a recipe for baked french toast, remembered the main parts, but mostly improvised the recipe AGAIN. The actual recipe called for milk, which I didn't have.

So as I ate, I prepared the next dish. I measured 3/4 of a cup of whipping cream and poured it into another (bigger) chinese bowl. I cracked two eggs into the cream (I had three), but the mixture looked a little too light for me, so I cracked in the last one.

To the pale yellow mixture, I added about half a teaspoon (again, estimate) of vanilla extract, and probably a ton of love (aw..) I then soaked a few pieces of bread with the eggy cream mixture (actually it kinda smelled a little like egg nog.) (I can't remember how many infact, I made two batches, each batch about, 2 and half or 3 pieces of bread I suppose? could be more, I can't remember.) I lined the oven baking tray with aluminium foil shiny side down and coated it with melted butter (it was warm, so i just took the butter and gave the foil a thin swipe) I then carefully placed the soaked bread onto the aluminium foil, a little like playing tetris (haha). On top of the pieces of bread I sprinkled brown sugar, then I stuffed them in a oven set to about 175-180 degrees and let them bake for 15 minutes. In the oven the mixture became puffy, but after cooking it kinda flattened out.

Voila, my french toast was done. And it was also about time to go out. I just removed the entire sheet of foil and placed it ontop of the oven to cool while I put another batch into the oven (the second batch was for my mom and bro) I went to change and pack my stuff at this time. When I was about to leave I stuffed the first batch of toast into a lunchbox I washed earlier and took them with me to the range.

I felt quite accomplished when I put those pieces of bread into the lunchbox.

P.S. I'd warn anyone who wants to try the french toast recipe about putting them on aluminium foil, the sugar(and egg) tends to make the bread stick to the foil, so remove them carefully, or try using wax paper instead of aluminium foil, I don't gurantee it won't stick, but its worth a shot.

Also, its probably more digestable than metal if you're not very patient.

Vanilla Twilight

2010-01-24T19:51:00.002+08:00

Vanilla Twilight
by Owl City

The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you, dear
'Cause I wish you were here

I'll watch the night turn light-blue
But it's not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly

The silence isn't so bad
'Til I look at my hands and feel sad
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly

I'll find repose in new ways
Though I haven't slept in two days
'Cause cold nostalgia
Chills me to the bone

But drenched in vanilla twilight
I'll sit on the front porch all night
Waist-deep in thought because
When I think of you I don't feel so alone

I don't feel so alone, I don't feel so alone

As many times as I blink
I'll think of you
Tonight

I'll think of you tonight

When violet eyes get brighter
And heavy wings grow lighter
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again

And I'll forget the world that I knew
But I swear I won't forget you
Oh, if my voice could reach
Back through the past
I'd whisper in your ear
Oh darling, I wish you were here

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Reading the lyrics, I kinda see it as someone who has died and is remembering his girlfriend from when he was still alive. Does anyone else see it?

I repeat, I am NOT a literature student.

tasteless

2010-01-23T19:46:00.002+08:00

Should have blogged this yesterday, but what the hay. I'm not known for punctuality.

Anyway. Do you know whats REALLY tasteless?

Bringing your ~~girlfriend~~ boyfriend to a gathering where he knows like, 3 of 15 people.

A farewell party, for a person who does not even know your "special" friend.

Ah the lesser captain has done it again.

And I have to applaud you, "nice" excuse of "going to buy water and going MIA for half an hour when the nearest place to buy water is at the most 5 minutes for a two way trip. Who knows what you really went to do. *coughcough*

Am I talking like a hypocrite? "Oh but you brought YOUR boyfriend to a friend's Christmas party!"

Well shut up, cause he was INVITED BY THE HOST.

Seriously, does anyone else not see whats wrong with this?

its a good day

2010-01-21T22:15:00.001+08:00

NO MORE MERGER!!! YESS!!!!

not sure about the details, probably cause kim was telling mr matthews the problems which would arise from the merger. but he said, the solution for those problems, is NO MERGER!!

YES! NO MERGER!!! WE'RE NOT GONNA BE TAKEN ADVANTAGED OF! XD

bow chika bow wow.

my muscles are aching like hell, but...

its a good day

stomach

2010-01-20T22:16:00.001+08:00

i wonder whats wrong with me, my stomach has been so weird lately. when i dont feel like eating, i really cant eat. even if i know i have to and havent eaten for hours :\ its not healthy

OUTRAGE!

2010-01-18T19:12:00.006+08:00

I rage so hard.

ITS A FREAKING OUTRAGE I TELL YOU.

Guess what guys?

We had a Creative Writing Circle meeting today, first official one in the year. Guess what our new teacher tells us?

"I'm going to merge you guys with the literature society."

like, WTF?

Long story short. Mr Woolhead got transferred to another school, they put in a new teacher for us. He is also the teacher of ACsian and the literature society. And basically, for the sake of his convenience, he decides to merge US with the LIT SOC to form the "Creative Writing & Literature Circle".

Guess what, he already got approval from the school's CCA council. He made the decision WITHOUT CONSULTING US!

I MEAN COME ON! WE'RE A BLOODY DEMOCRATIC COUNTRY! NOT A FREAKING COMMUNIST ONE!

Well you see, this does not even remotely benefit the Creative Writing Circle. Just him and the Lit soc.

1. He gets the benefit of the convenience
2. Lit soc gets the benefit of tapping into OUR publication (There Is No Spoon) Yeah, they wanted to create a publication too, but figured it would be redundant because we had one and there was another school english publication.
3. Lit soc gets a share of OUR CCA Board. Yes. We even have to share our BOARD. Our RIGHT. the freaking subject societies aren't supposed to have boards!

Can ANYONE remotely see any way that this would even remotely benefit US?

C.W.C HAS BEEN AROUND FOR TWENTY BLOODY YEARS! DOESNT THAT AMOUNT TO ANYTHING? THEY'VE BEEN AROUND FOR ONE YEAR! ONE FREAKING YEAR!

Now, all our plans are going to have to be put in the "CWLC" concept. our jacket, our board, our future banner, our booth, videos. EVERYTHING!

I am so pissed off about this.
Oh.
AND WE DIDN'T HAVE A BLOODY SAY IN ANY OF THIS!
The Lit Soc people practically sold their dignity for a board and a newsletter.

Christmas don't be late

2010-01-16T23:54:00.002+08:00

I was watching the chipmunks this morning when I got home after breakfast with my brother

it reminded me of a conversation I had with Kian Yang after I got home from watching Alvin and the Chipmunks 2.

You see, after I came home, I started looking for a whole bunch of chipmunk stuff for my blog post.

So I find a clip from the chipmunks adventure movie. the Chipettes singing "Getting Lucky".

Our conversation kind of went like this

Me: "'It was so much more innocent in the past, 'getting lucky' used to mean along the lines of 'get together', right now, it pretty much means 'getting laid'.
Kian Yang: "And 'Christmas Don't Be Late' is pretty much telling Christmas to not be pregnant."
Me: "O_O WTF KIAN YANG? You just ruined my childhood T_T."
Kian Yang: "(cant remember what he said but on the track of "its a curse") when my genious brain allows me to connect links where there should be none."
Me: "It allows you to have extreme egotisticness as well."

well the conversation wasn't like that, but it was along those lines. kian yang is an egotistic $#@^@%#

he freaking ruined my childhood T_T

pbworks

2010-01-11T20:15:00.003+08:00

Firstly, I would like to say, HAPPY 3rd MONTH ANNIVERSARY HONEY BUNNY SHAWN! <3

First Day of school, it wasn't so bad, except Theophiphi kept talking about Sarah for some reason. I'm thinking there is a chance he likes her. Only clue he gave me was the girl he liked (and was chasing) had long hair. Yeah, helpful, it narrows it down to like, three quarters of the school. (Yes, I can't imagine him having a friend outside of school :X)

I personally like my time table now. Okay, so we have giant blocks of lessons, but still, I end early on most days, so its good.

Anyway, I was introduced to a new website today, and I'm thinking of permanently using it as my workspace for my creative writing. Yes, I will be discontinuing the AOEW blog, all posts would be transferred to this website eventually. It takes time for me to transfer all the stories, right now I only have two of them up, eventhough I have three folders there. So, if you want to read my stories, head over to this website, where I'm going to compile them all.

http://jeannelmah.pbworks.com/

self pwnz

2010-01-08T11:09:00.002+08:00

tim's self pwn:

Kim: "its so small!"
Tim: "Thats what SHE said."
Me: "omg you just self pwned yourself."

*tim and shawn laughs*

Kim: "I dont get it"
Me: "Tim said "thats what SHE said" when you said its so small, meaning that she was saying it to her"
Kim: "still dont get it"
Shawn: "Ok Kim, think,"
Me: "Horny."
Tim: "like penises."

and she still didnt get it until i told cheng heng. LOL.

Vampire Lovers chapter 2

2010-01-05T23:00:00.003+08:00

GET ON WITH YOUR HOMEWORK PEOPLE! SCHOOL STARTS SOON! :D

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Disclaimer: This chapter might get slightly... perverse. Don't worry, I'll be keeping this between PG13 and NC16. Though, it might get a little bit racist.

Vampire Lovers
By Jeannel Mah

Chapter 2

When I woke up, it took me a while to remember where I was. It was dark, but not as dark as I remembered it to be, yes, I remember now, I'm on Killian's bed, in Killian's house.

And I am a vampire.

Well, if the transformation was successful that is, if it wasn't, I'm probably just dead, and am now a ghost haunting a vampire's house. To be sure of this, I lifted my hands, I couldn't see through myself, and I could lift the blanket and pillows up, so I arrived to the conclusion that I was still alive.

No, alive is not the right way to put it, because technically, as a vampire, I am not alive, just, the living dead, I suppose.

Well enough about that.

I moved the shroud covering the bed and looked out into the room, the clock by the bedside told me that it was 9 p.m. Killian was standing by the window, looking out through the darkened glass. Without turning he said, "Good Evening, my princess of darkness. You slept a long time, but I guess thats expected, I didn't wake until twelve on my first night, then again, I have a much larger frame than you." I frowned at his comment, I am short in height, and often get teased by this fact. And now it occurred to me that I just may have problems in hunting because of this. Oh damn.

"It won't be a problem in hunting, though." Said Killian suddenly, looking at me. Wow, he's good. "Merely a little bit of light mind reading, its one of my talents, I can see specific things about people's lives, like their name, the names and faces of the people they love dearly, but only major points of their lives, I can't tell the little details. Also, I can tell what they are thinking just at the moment they are thinking it, and only if they are thinking of words, for example, if they are silently speaking to themselves, like you do frequently. " I think I blushed at this, because this is actually quite true, I always speak to myself. I may have a mental problem.

In all the books I had read in my life, they always talk of how a vampire would be thristy for blood, how they need blood to quench their insatiable thirst. I felt cheated, because that is not the feeling that I had. It was more of a craving, I suppose like how a pregnant woman would feel, but instead of food, this was a craving for blood.

"I want to drink, I'm craving for blood." I said aloud. The expression on Killian's face was laughable. "You sound like a child you know that?" He replied, laughing. "Come on, change out of your death clothes and we'll go out for breakfast." "Breakfast?" I said, "Its nine in the night, and we're going for breakfast?" He laughed even more and said, "I'm so glad I changed you, you're such a laugh. Fine, supper then. My treat." I wondered what he meant by that, weren't we just going to pluck random people off the street? He walked out of the room, and my eyes spied a black dress placed over the chair. It was a semi formal dress, and it was actually rather pretty. 'He has a sense of fashion,' I thought. I dumped my old clothes on the bed, won't be needing them anymore, for tonight at least.

I looked at myself in the mirror after turning the room lights on. I realised that I was actually looking at myself in the mirror, so its not true that vampires have no reflections. This made me recall when I saw Killian's reflection in the bus window. I felt enlightened.

Being egotistic, I'll be saying that the dress looked beautiful on me, though a stark contrast with my pale vampire skin. Despite the unhealthy pale skin, I think I looked more beautiful than I did before. My long hair was as it always was, slightly curled and brown, but it looked healthier and smoother. The blemishes on my skin were now gone, as were my few scars. My face was softer, and yet more defined, its hard to explain, my features just looked better, but it was still definitely, distinctively me. But the biggest difference would be my eyes, right now, my eyes were grey. I loved the colour, but it just was not me. "I'll probably just get coloured contact lenses some time soon." I said. Of course, I had fangs, they were small, but sharp, unnoticeable until you really concentrated on it.

When I walked out of the room, I heard Killian's voice say "See if you can hear this." I looked at him, and said, "Why wouldn't I be able to hear it?" He was smiling his cheeky, and slightly creepy, smile again. "Because you're reading all this from my mind, just by concentrating on, and thinking of me. Oh, but more importantly because I'm letting you hear all this." He said this without speaking, yes, an oxymoron, I know. "Is that why I couldn't read your mind in the room? Because you blocked me?" I asked. He just smiled and walked to the front door. I ran after him, feeling lighter and faster than usual.

He opened his mouth this time to say, "I'm going on a slow jog now, try to keep up with me alright?" Then he started jogging, but it was extremely fast, kind of like a car's speed on the highway. I ran, trying to keep up with him, eventhough I knew I was running faster and longer than any human, or animal, ever could, I still had to summon all my strengh to keep up with Killian. 'That's what he calls a slow jog?' I thought. When I was outside I realised that colours were nicer than usual, not exactly brighter, just, nicer. I could hear sounds more clearly, smell aromas more sharply. Basically, all my senses were heightened. If I still had doubts till now as to whether or not I was a predator, these doubts were cleared now.

We came to a halt eventually. "Speed comes with experience and age my dear, eventually you'll be able to run as fast as me, my speed was trained since 1910, the year I was born into the dark. So don't be too worried if you can't keep up just yet."

"Thats reassuring," I said, looking around. We were just outside the local red light district. "What the hell are we doing here?" I questioned. "Supper." He said casually, grabbing my hand and walking towards the street of pubs and brothels.

"Here's the download," said Killian, "You know how to act right? Well, we're going to go into the most... liberal.. pub in the area, once we're there, we're going to act as a couple, we'll drink some booze, yes we can drink booze, it won't harm us, try to pick up a couple of prostitutes, first we have to look for two of them who don't mind a kinky orgy. Don't give me that disgusted look, we're not actually going to be having sex, its just a lure. From here, pretend to be bisexual," at this point I hit him, "Ouch, do you want blood or not? Coming back to my point, I'll pay them, and we'll take a cab home, you can sit infront if you want. Now, after turning me on," I hit him again, "Just kidding! Anyway, after we get back to the house, keep up the act, and at my lead, take them."

"Sounds like alot of work just for some blood." I told Killian. He gave the excuse that since its my first kill, why not make it a fun one, while in the process teaching me something about our attractive powers. "We're like angler fish you see, we are able to lure our prey in effortlessly, then we feast."

With me clinging onto his arm, we walked into a club which was three quarters filled with caucasian customers, although, the girls working there were mostly oriental. I walked in with Killian, disliking the odour of sweaty men. "Control yourself," He said. I tried to filter out the different smells with my mind, and amazingly, I managed to do so. We took a seat at a table inside the pub, and Killian went to buy us a couple of drinks, as well as try to pick up a set dinner.

"Hey there baby girl, what are you doing sitting alone?" a man came and sat next to me. He thought I was a prostitute, I wanted to punch him. I gave him a sarcastic smile and said, "I'm sorry, I'm not into guys, I prefer girls." "Well maybe after tonight, you'll change your mind." He replied, inching closer to me. I grabbed onto the collar of his shirt and stared at him straight in the eye, my face just milimeters from his, the stench of stale beer lingered on his breath, I wanted to vomit.

"You don't want to mess with me buster, you don't want to know what I can do to you." I threatened. Instead of being scared, he seemed excited at this and placed his hand on my knee, wanting to slowly move it up my leg. "Oh I think I do want to know." he breathed. At this, I sent him images, images of him being tied up to a wall by his limbs, he was vulnerable, and naked, literally naked, by that I mean stripped of skin, well, it was more like just his skin and muscle were cut straight down the middle, then pulled towards the side of his body and pinned down, revealing his internal organs, the beating heart, the churning stomach, everything, alive and in pain. I was there, holding the knife dripping with blood.

With these images implanted into his brain, he pulled away from me, he backed off, staring at me wide-eyed, as if my head had suddenly transformed into that of a monster's, he fell off the chair, and I sat there, laughing.

When that lecher ran off, his name was Jacob, Killian came back smiling and clapping. I gave half bows. "Now that's something I can't do," said Killian, emphasizing on the 'that's' "I could never send images to mortals with my mind, and what a beautifully macabre image you thought of, I'm proud of you Chaton Aimé." I half bowed, like an entertainer would, only sitting down. "I didn't know I could do that either, it was so instinctive." I replied.

"Ah Kitty, you'll be surprising yourself alot more in the weeks to come." said Killian, taking his seat next to me and passing me a shotglass of clear liquid, "Now take a look at those two tarts over there," he said, taking a swig of his drink, a thick golden liquid, I did the same. "Seventeen year old girls from mainland China, here on a student's pass, but one of them is planning to have a relationship with a rich married man, then break the family up and become his bride. The other one is just here to earn some money, have a good education, then move to another country, she is basically planning to break the bond of her scholarship." I was disgusted at these things, which I could see myself was true. So these were the type of people Killian targeted, but wait, why did he target me? I didn't think of myself immoral in anyway.

I was relieved when he said, "Don't worry about yourself darling, sometimes I like to target sweet little girls, they just taste sweeter." I didn't know whether to be relieved by this or outraged, how many innocent girl's lives has he taken. But then realised that I may eventually do that myself, I felt ashamed, but pushed that thought of my mind.

"Today, those two girls are here looking to earn some money, targeting on horny, rich Caucasian men. Well, obviously we're not Caucasian, but we are, at least, I am, rich. And I'm sure the money is more important than the race for their customers." With this, he went up to those two young girls and smoothly slipped his hands around their waists and whispered something into their ears, they looked at each other, pondering, then giggled and agreed. He passed them a couple stacks of hundred dollar bills, which I knew he would take back later on. 'Nice one Killian,' I thought.

My act started when the three of them returned to the table, "Darling," said Killian, "These two lovely ladies have agreed to join us in a little adventure tonight." A girl came to sit on one side of me, Killian sat on the other with the other girl at his side. The girl who came to sit next to me was the one who wants to be a mistress, she was young, typical chinese face, not very attractive, but I guess she had her charm. Brown-blonde dyed, straightened hair, dressing very typical of a whore, tight mini-skirt, tight midrift top, boots. I was dreading this, but if I wanted my dinner to come quietly I had to do it. "Hello, pretty," I said, putting one arm around her and the other stroking her outer thigh, going up her skirt. "We're going to have so much fun tonight," I whispered. By 'we' I pretty much meant Killian and I. Killian was keeping himself busy with the other girl, touching and fondling her, 'Geeze,' I thought, 'He's actually enjoying this.' 'I might be, or this could just be a very elaborate act.' he replied.

We drank a little, then gave the girls some drinks, just to make them slightly tipsy. It was about one in the morning now, I put my arms over Killian, with the girl leaning and feeling me up on the other side, I said with a whine, "Honeeeeyyyy, its so hot here. Can we go home now?" With my mind I told Killian, 'The craving is strong now, I need to drink.' Being totally showy, Killian exclaimed, "Alright, lets go, come my pretties." The four of us walked out of the pub, my and Killian stabalizing the two girls. As I looked around I took the glances of quite a few men as we walked past them, most of their thoughts were, 'What a lucky bastard,' 'Someone's going to get alot tonight,' 'Why can someone like him get a hot lesbian girlfriend?' I almost laughed at that last one, because he can't tell the difference between lesbian and bisexual apparently.

We got into a cab and Killian told the driver the address to drive to. I sat infront, thankful for the alone time, those girls are just personal space invaders. Killian looked like he was having fun in the back, with the two girls kissing him and touching him, letting him touch them, I turned around to stop myself from vomiting.

We reached Killian's house in about half an hour, and I helped him escort the girls in. They didn't wonder about the darkness of the house, they were just wondering how they could get extra money for their services.

We brought them to the living room, there was a television there, and a couple of couches, and chairs, thick lush carpet. I laid the girl on the three seater sofa, Killian put another one on another chair. She kissed my neck and tried to undress me, I removed her hands from myself and held it down on her side, I sneaked a look at Killian, he was removing her top, I turned back around, deciding I didn't want to see this. Killian sent me a thought, "Drink, my precious.' At this, I licked at her neck, tasting the skin, it was salty. I heard the other girl moan, then gasp. Then opening my mouth I bit down, and blood rushed out of the wound into my mouth, I lapped it all up. She gasped, too drunk to do anything, although she tried to push me off, I held her down. The other one started screaming in mandrin, "It hurts, stop! What are you doing!" I was holding my meal down by the neck so she couldn't scream. I sucked at her neck, I was thinking she didn't deserve the mercy that Killian gave me, I knew the involuntary removal of blood would hurt alot, I could feel it.

The blood was delicious and strong, it was salty, tasted like iron, but it was deliciously thick, Vampire wine. However, there was a disgustingly bitter after taste. Killian later told me that this was because the person's heart was bitter and rotten, it made sense to me. Once all her blood had been drained, I left her on the couch, cold and dead, and walked off to the kitchen where I washed down the bitter after taste with some delicious water,'Wow, even water tastes better.' I thought, Killian didn't stop me. I looked at my reflection in the darkened glass window, my eyes were darker. Looking in a mirror I noticed that they were now brown, confused, I turned around to where Killian was standing, smiling. His eyes were darker as well.

"Killian, why are my eyes brown now? They were grey before." I asked.

He replied, "Common sense my darling, you were starved of blood, and now that you have blood, the blood makes your eyes darker, in this case, brown."

"Vampires are interesting creatures." I commented again.

"Yes, now time to clear off the bodies, help me with this dear." Said Killian, very business-like. He went back into the room where the bodies were, and effortlessly picked up one of the girls. I picked up the other, she was so easy to pick up, almost weightless, and followed him, down into the basement.

The basement was not dark or creepy at all, definitely not what I thought. There was another television here, in a seperated room, I could tell this room was soundproof, and it was filled with entertainment devices. Gaming consoles, surround sound, the works. "Nice basement," I told Killian as he opened a door. Behind the door, it was basically, a closet. With brooms and such. Killian put the girl on the floor and felt around the closet for a concealed handle, which he pulled, And the closet wall opened up, revealing a room behind it. Ingenious, no one would ever suspect this, this room was cut directly into the ground, inside the house and yet seperated from it. He picked up the girl and walked into the room. Inside the room there was what looked like a large furnace. There was a metal tube running from the top of the furnace.

"Where does the smoke travel to?" I asked Killian, "Simple," he said, "Up to the surface, into a the trunk of a tree cleverly planted on top of the opening. You see, its technically good for the tree, all the extra carbon dioxide, also the tree contains the smoke, so no one would see the smoke rising from the ground. Don't worry, there are coolants between here and there, so the tree doesnt burn up, there is also a filter which I change regularly, so that only carbon dioxide is released." I realise now that, eventhough Killian is a little eccentric, he's actually quite smart.

He opened the furnace hatch, it was dark and cold. He threw the dear girl into the furnace, and I threw the other girl in, after this, Killian closed the hatch, and turned on the furnace. We walked out of the room, letting the corpses cremate.

"How did you like your supper?" Killian asked. "Mostly delicious," I said, "my craving's gone." "Excellent," he replied, "Now I think you want to go do something, don't you? I'll be here when you get back, don't get back too late now."

"Yes mom." I said as I ran out of the house with my keys.

I ran all the way home, to my apartment. Throughout my journey I pondered how I would explain everything to my love, I decided in the end, that I wouldn't, not yet. I now stood outside my apartment door, it was 3 a.m, I had about three and a half more hours more before I had to return to Killian's house.

When I opened the door something heavy threw itself against me, I noticed the scent as my Amoureux de Sang, my roommate, my best friend, my boyfriend, my life. "Chaton Aimé! Where have you been! I've been so worried, I tried to call you but you wouldn't pick up." I inhaled deeply, savouring the perfume of him, hugging him, not wanting to let go. Wanting to cry I told him, "I only have a couple of hours, I need to leave for a while."

I could see the horror on his face, "Where are you going? I'm going with you." I pushed him away and walked into the house, to pack my things. "No, you can't. I don't have time to explain to you, but I have to go." I grabbed a few clothes and threw them into a bag. He grabbed my hand.

"I won't let you go." he said, steadfast. I wanted to cry, I turned to look at him, his beautiful face, dark brown eyes, I touched his soft hair, it was even nicer than I remembered it to be. "I'll explain to you everything when I get back, in a couple weeks. I just need you to believe me now and help me." I sent him feelings of love, calm, his grip softened, and he let go.

"Baby, I need you to wait for me, I will be back soon, but during the time I'm gone, if anyone asks about me, tell them that I am overseas." He nods, the sadness on his face breaks my dead heart. "You know I love you, now and forever. I'll explain everything to you when I get back." I told him, then hugged him. He was so warm, his hug felt so good, I didn't want to let go.

"Promise me you will at least give me a message everyday." he said softly, we were so sad, he looked like he was about to cry. I know I did.

"I love you Amoureux de Sang," I said, kissing him, making sure my fangs didn't puncture his lips, he tasted so sweet. Tears flowed down my face. I brought him to his bed and lay him there, hugging him, sending him more feelings of calm and rest, he eventually fell asleep. I was still crying as I pulled myself away from him. Sunlight was barely an hour away, so I grabbed my things and ran, as fast I could, back to Killian's house.

"You took a long time Chaton Aimé." Killian said as I walked into the room, he was watching television. I could see the sunlight on the horizon as I closed the black curtains. I went into bed, building a wall of pillows between me and Killian. "What? No snuggling?" he said, faking disappointment. I ignored him.

I'm grateful that he didn't say anything else after that.

I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND!

2010-01-04T23:33:00.002+08:00

I LOVE MY BOYFRIEND!

xD

what? I do.

Shawn I love you. Thank you so much for today, I had so much fun.

Basically, quite a while ago I was whining saying how I wanted to try out modelling and stuff. So he has been looking around for a place where they would do my make up and hair then take pictures like helping me with the poses and stuff.

So yeap, we went to make an appointment for today last week. I chose some clothes with my mom and his help (did i mention the cost of the thing was paid by him and my mom?) And we went there today, there was a mix up and the lady apparently booked the appointment for tomorrow, but it didn't matter because there was no one else today.

So yup, I got dressed into my first set of clothes, then this nice girl did my make up and hair, was joined by her collegue later on. After that, we went into the studio where this guy called James helped me with the poses and took the pictures. I changed to my prom night gown, rinse and repeat.

After the shoot, we looked at the photos (alot of which looks nice and some which are so not me O_O) chose one for the wallet sized print, and then we're off.

went for jubeat, dinner at billy bombers, then we went to buy this bunny couple keychain thingy which we were wearing as wrist bands all the way home aw <3

darling i love you. thank you <3

Just because it feels damn good.

2010-01-01T20:59:00.003+08:00

Happy New Year people.

Lets hope this year is better than the last.

yay

2009-12-30T22:30:00.012+08:00

shawny came over to my house this morning, he came holding this

So sweet right? ^^ i think it is, cute too <3>>sad<<>

anyway, went to bishan after that to try out luck, which apparently is non existent. movies were selling fast, queues long, no freaking way.

saw kian yang and we talked to him for a while (he was wearing the shirt we bought from shopping the other day! LOL!) saw william too who apparently went to play jubeat.

called my brother to get him to try to book tickets for us. (which pretty much to no avail) we came back home, in the end i gave up and went to yellow pages to look for the cineplex number (had to be transferred 3 times =.=) but we got tickets for the 6 o clock show.

so we left again to go to orchard cineleisure, got the tickets, walked around, went inside to watch the show.

well, its super cute *squeals everytime theodore does something cute* xD is shooo kyooote. I *heart* Theodore xD. I personally think britney is more awesome than alvin, she actually wants to share the limelight with her siblings. =.=

not a bad show i guess, not fantastic, but not bad. pretty funny at some parts haha. but I agree with eva, i do prefer these guys

their adventures were more fun and interesting. (and eva, i remember the episode [which i think was actually a movie] with the dolls of money too xD)

oh anyone knew that the chipmunks looked like this, like 50 years ago?

yes people, the chipmunks really are THAT old. and yes, theodore was NOT the smallest, neither was his voice the squeakiest, his voice was actually quite low considering. im not kidding.

oh, while sourcing for these pictures, i found some pictures people made of "nude" chipettes, seriously. disgusting.

However, during the movie, when the chipettes make their first appearance, i couldn't help but say, "Don't look! They're naked!"

...
..
.

What? They are!

VERSUS!

VERSUS!

its hard finding videos of the songs in the movie =.=

anyway, which do you prefer? i like the 2nd one most

i hate you

2009-12-28T01:53:00.001+08:00

I HATE YOU!

I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU!

...

2009-12-28T01:37:00.002+08:00

3....2.....1....

$#QJTONRGQLEKMGSDPGU$)#GMSL:DAMBFODU )AK#WL:MR#LO@JTG)S IE{QJRLEMBFDOS)(#_O$K#@TMGRFHVU#!IP@QKFCSPDM VGB)IRQ){KIF#$OJVFDJGVVVLEOJGVPAEJGOPWJTGOP$Q U#@OPML:EF VVGBU%$REWSFDDY%TOSUEPFJMEWL:MFSDOUT#
C#)@URSLEMV:SDH(APMVLFDMAP#@KFS:DLMVFYV(&R)EYT%MBFDYUPEJHGBCVNM VCKLFEW(QRU{WQR#PTUG)XJL:NEUTPREYG+$#YHTR:BMVFLUREOHGFMNNNFDLOPUFEPHQL:MGL:FDHBPMVCGL: J.

*breathe*

no there is no hidden meaning in that. i was just hoping that some of my frustration could be released.

and looks like it didn't.

screw it all.

just screw it.

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-26T01:11:00.002+08:00

Merry Christmas people!

Well actually its boxing day, its just that I only feel like posting now.

Used the money I earned from the start of the year to buy my gifts this year, was totally worth it when I saw how much my mom liked her present. I'm happy.

Christmas eve dinner was full of food, really. we ate so much, and yet we had so much food left.

Thanks for the book dear, I really appreciate it :)

finally

2009-12-18T18:42:00.008+08:00

Finally, the week is over. He's coming home tonight. I'm glad.

Plans for the week, tomorrow I've got momo's christmas party. then on the 25th, my parents are attending a wedding dinner, and i'm probably going for abby's christmas party. meow.

Hm. I had an idea with Kimberley the other day, about writing a story about a hospital, run by vampires, which would double as a vampire restaurant. She'll probably write it, I don't think i will.

However, I do feel like writing something about vampires. I'll just write it here.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vampire Lovers
by Jeannel Mah

Chapter 1
I am on the last bus home, the only one on the bus save the driver. I have gone home by myself at this time before, but today, its different, its unusually quiet. Sounds are muted tonight for some reason, as if somebody put earmuffs on my head without my knowing, but I checked, there were none.

"Ten minutes away from home," I sighed, talking to no one in particular. I am exhausted, it is late, and I had spent the entire day busy, travelling from one end of the country to the other, running errands for my friends. I know, that sounds as if I am a character in a game doing quests so that I could advance, but its not, that was really what I did today. Looking out the window, at the things going by, my eyes were getting heavy and they started to close, but at the very moment that only slivers of light entered my eyes, I could have sworn I saw a man sitting behind me, it was a reflection in the glass.

My eyes jolted open, I didn't notice anyone else come on board. I turned around, an automated reaction, but there was no one there. My heart started pumping adrenaline through my veins. "Its just your eyes playing tricks on you, you're tired, its bound to happen.", so said the logical part of my brain. It took a couple minutes for my heart rate to slow down again, and it just so happens that its my stop, so I got off the bus.

Strangely, there was no one at the bus stop, then it stuck me, of course there would be no one waiting for the buses, there aren't any more buses anywhere, I was on the very last bus. Occassionally a car went past the road, other than that, there was no one around. Usually its silent this time of night, but tonight, it was an eyrie silence. I continued to walk on the path home. My senses were muted, I didn't like it, so I walked faster. There was something following me, eventhough I could not see it, I could feel its presence, it was there, following me, watching me, a predator stalking its prey.

I rounded a corner, and there he was. A man, standing right infront of me, only he wasn't a normal man, he was very pale, white even. He stared straight at me, straight into my soul with eyes which were filled with blood lust. He smiled and said, "Chaton Aimé". Upon hearing that I stood there, transfixed.

"How do you know my name? Who are you? What do you want?" I questioned.

He then appeared right behind me, and without moving his lips he said, "Well, since today will be your last day, I'll tell you, as your dying wish. I can see what you are, who you are, I am a Vampire, my name is Killian," he said these last few words very slowly, wanting to torture me with the words, "And I. Want. Your. Blood." Ironically, it was this moment when all my fears left me.

I could feel his shock, he walked infront of me and looked me in the eyes. "Why... Why are you not afraid, little one?" He asked, confused, "You should be begging for your life! Why is it that the moment I mention your death, your fear dissipates?"

I told him the reason, "I want it, Mr Killian. If all I've heard is true, if one bite from a vampire can turn me into a vampire, I want to be bitten, I want to be a vampire." These words were true, from my heart and soul, I had always been facinated by the vampires I read in novels, immortal, powerful, beautiful. The vampire laughed at this.

"You want to be a vampire?" He said, emphasising on the want. "You want to be living this partial life? When you are not dead, and yet not fully alive? You want to survive on taking the lives of others?" "If what I heard is true about vampires, that you are immortal and powerful, then yes, I do." I replied.

"You are a very interesting creature, Chaton Aimé, and its a very tempting idea, turning you into a vampire. After all, with every dark creature I make, I get some of your.. beneficial characteristics imbued into myself as well, when I take your vampiric blood. Call it.. an exchange of genes if you will. And if I changed you, I would also gain a beautiful, young companion..." His voice trailed off, savouring the idea.

"I do want to be a vampire, but my heart is loyal to another." I said. His face changed at this, to a look of discontent. "So, how would this exchange benefit me, Beloved Kitten?" Beloved Kitten was essentially what my name meant in english terms.

He had a good point, I thought a little, then I phrased my answer carefully, "Well, even if my beneficial characteristics aren't fantastic, you would gain yourself a new ally. I'm sure you did fine defending for yourself the amount of time you've lived, but what if it comes to one day where you are captured by an enemy? Perhaps held captive by another vampire, you could call for my aid and I would be obliged to come help you." My answer amused him, because he smiled a me, a smile which said, You're a joke, you know that? "You facinate me, Chaton Aimé, it is a pity you don't want to be my companion, you would be a great asset, with your knowledge, you even knew that creator and creation can communicate long distances with just our minds." In truth, I was taking a stab in the dark, I didn't know that, really.

"However, you do have a point, Kitty, I may need accomplices in the long run, so I accept your offer for your soul. However, I do have a few conditions of which you must promise me, and some questions you must answer." He told me.

"Firstly, are you willing to give up your soul? Because when you become a vampire, your soul can no longer be redeemed, there is only one place you would go should you ever really die, and that place is a place of pain, fear, known by many religions as hell. You will not go to what the Christians call heaven, you will not be reborn as the Buddhist believe, you will go to hell, no questions asked, even if you are a saint in your vampire life."

"Secondly, are you willing to live your half life, seeing your loved ones die one by one as the years past? Could you bear to see that sight, and not turn all of them into vampires?"

"Next, if I turn you into a vampire, you have to stay with me until I finish teaching you all you need to know, I think I have fallen in love with you, Chaton Aimé, and I do not want you to go off on your own just yet, vulnerable to the world."

"Lastly, when I do release you to the world on your own, I want you to promise me, to swear it on your soul, no, swear it on the one who has your heart, that if I ever summon you, you have to come to me."

These were the terms he proposed. I was very flattered by the bit where he fell in love with me, love at first bite? No, he hasn't bitten me yet, I remembered.

"I have listened to your conditions, and I still stand with my belief, I want to be made a vampire, and you have my word, I will be loyal to you forever." I said. I really wanted this, I was ready to accept the terms, nothing could stop my dream.

He put out his hand, as if wanting a handshake, "Then say goodbye to your life, and say hello to your death." He told me. I took his hand, and we flew. Alright, we didn't fly, but it felt like we did, he was running, and running fast, the world was a blur, and he was carrying me, effortlessly it seemed. After a minute or two, he stopped. We were at a house, a bungalow, it was modern, and beautiful. "Welcome to my house, that run was a rush, wasn't it?" he said. I nodded, still dazed.

He carried me into the house, the curtains were all closed, they were thick, opaque curtains. He carried me past the living room and up the stairs, into a bedroom. This room was fully furnished, a bed, dresser, television, but i doubt he used all the furniture in this room. This room had thick opaque curtains as well, an addition to that, the windows were tinted, probably letting in only ten to twenty percent of light.

He put me down and I looked around the room, "No coffin?" I asked. He gave a charming but cheeky smile and said "No, its the 21st century, we sleep on beds. There's a canopy around it which prevents even more light from passing through." I looked at the bed, and indeed, there was a shroud of even more opaque cloth around it. "Smart." I commented.

Killian took both my hands and beckoned me to the bed, "Have a seat, my queen, are you ready?" I sat down on the bed, and nodded. Now, as I sat in this room, reality finally struck me. "You're going to die now," said the voice in my head, "And when you wake up, you will never be the same again."

The vampire made me lie down on the bed, the bed was soft, but I felt uncomfortable, a guy was setting me down on a bed, and he is not the one I love, he is not my Amoureux de Sang. Soon, I told myself, soon I would go back to my darling, and take him with me, if he allows. I closed my eyes, Killian snuggled my neck and kissed it, it made me feel uncomfortable, he was savouring the scent of my blood. I was tempted to push him off, but I knew that if I wanted to become a vampire, I would have to just let him. "An eternity with the one I love." I told myself, thats my goal.

It took me by surprise when he finally bit me. The pain was sharp when his fangs pieced my aorta, but it didn't last long, it was like taking an injection, painful when piercing, painless during the time after. I felt him taste my blood, he loved it, I could tell. He was licking my neck, lapping the blood up, letting my own heart beat pump the blood out of my body instead of him using energy to suck it out of me. I was thankful for that, the fact that he was not forcing the blood to leave my body.

My senses got even more dull, the world was fading away slowly. "No wonder," I said, "no wonder everything was so silent tonight, its the night of my death." Still drinking, Killian said, "Yes my love, your body knew it even before you did. Your blood is delicious." I felt like a meal, and in this case, I essentially was one.

"I'm dying, aren't I?" I whispered, breathing the words more than saying them. I could feel my heart slowing down, slowing to a halt. "Yes, my beautiful one, my Chaton Aimé, you are dying, now," He then bit into his wrist, allowing his own blood to flow. His blood was dark red, blood without oxygen, he put his wrist to my mouth. "Drink." Weakly, I licked his blood, it was deliciously salty and tasted of iron. I had tasted blood before, from wounds and such, but it has never tasted so delicious, so rich, so salty yet sweet, and this vampiric blood was much more fluid than human blood, it was purely red blood cells, which gives the iron flavour. I figured, vampires have no need for the extra substances such as white blood cells and platelets, their wounds regenerate without clotting, and they do not get illnesses in which the body's immune system has to fight off. What the red blood cells were there for, however, I have no idea. They are for transporting various vampiric substances which are only carried by red blood cells, these substances sustain us, the blood told me this, I thought this was very interesting.

"How does it taste my little one?" Killian asked. "Delicious," I said, lapping it all up. After a few minutes, he took his wrist away, and it was only now that I realised that the wound on my neck had already healed, no more blood came from it, yes, I was that dazed.

I felt Killian's vampiric blood flow through all my blood vessels, filling me with the dark substance. There was pain, but it was more of a dull ache, as the vampiric substances filled every bit of my body tissue. "The ache is supposed to be there," Said Killian lovingly, "Vampiric substances are turning all your human cells into vampire cells. If you add science into the mixture, basically, the vampiric blood is putting your cells into suspended animation, the brains of your cells, the nucleus, is basically killed, ceasing your natural bodily functions, thus, your cells no longer replicate, no longer multiply, you stop growing, and you stop aging."

"And if you were wondering 'So how do we heal when we are injured?', which I know you are thinking, well. these vampiric substances are made in blood, which is why we must replenish our fill of blood whenver we get injured, we don't have hunt often, only when we are injured, provided there is enough blood to heal the wounds in the first place, there usually is, we only need a small amount for a large wound anyway. You see, vampiric substances are much like viruses, in this case, they invade red blood cells to replicate, but unlike viruses, which only reason for existing is to replicate, vampiric substances heal our wounds by replacing the cells which we lost due to injury, how it does that is still a mystery, but thats what it does. And thus, we rise to hunt again."

His reasoning filled me with much interest, "Vampires are interesting creatures." I commented. "Hush now my darling," said my maker, "let yourself become one, now, I trust you would want to inform your roommate that you won't be coming home tonight." My roommate, I thought, then I recalled who I was staying with, the love of my life, in that rented apartment. "Yes," I said, "please, send him a message with my phone, tell him I am staying over with a friend, and will be home tomorrow night." I planned to return home tomorrow, even if its just to say a temporary goodbye. "Very well my pet." replied Killian, I knew that he already knew the name of my roommate.

After he took the phone from my pocket I lay on the bed, now I felt how soft it was, pillows so puffy as my head rested on them. I laid still, letting my body become transformed, and as the blood filled my brain, the whole world became black as I passed out, letting my brain adjust to its new functions.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OMG IM FINALLY FINISHED! I started writing this at like 6pm YESTERDAY. I think this is the longest single chapter i've ever written for any of my writings. (including AOEW and Dolls and Marionettes)

Of course, i took a few breaks while writing, but im FINALLY done! omg! *brain exhausted*

oh, don't be jealous darling, Killian isnt the main character, very soon you will see Amoureux de Sang in the story (although i think he will only become a major character in chapter 3, i havent decided yet.)

new skin :D

2009-12-16T12:53:00.001+08:00

new blogskin! yay! :D

i needed something to take my mind off missing my honey bunny T_T

would you dance?

2009-12-08T21:13:00.002+08:00

Lets take a stroll my love, will you not follow me?
Go on, put on that pretty pink dress and we shall leave

Ah, there you are my love, my pink princess, come, close your eyes and take my hand.
Follow me, trust me.

Open your eyes love, we have arrived.
Do you see what I see?
Look around , my adorable dove, are these flowers not your favourite?
All these belong to you, as I belong to you.

Sit down love, take a rest on the soft green grass.
I have picked an apple for you, do you see how red and ripe it is?
Take a bite my dear, let the juice dribble down your cute little chin.
How does it taste love? Does it taste sweet like me?

Come here love, take my hand, my beautiful swan.
Dance with me, move those petite feet, and move to my voice.
Throw your hands up in the air and twirl, let yourself loose!
Enjoy the moment my love, enjoy yourself, before you are forced to leave me again.

2009-12-06T23:05:00.002+08:00

FireFlies
by Owl City

You would not believe your eyes
If ten million fireflies
Lit up the world as I fell asleep

'Cause they'd fill the open air
And leave teardrops everywhere
You'd think me rude
But I would just stand and stare

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems

'Cause I'd get a thousand hugs
From ten thousand lightning bugs
As they tried to teach me how to dance

A foxtrot above my head
A sock hop beneath my bed
A disco ball is just hanging by a thread

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

Leave my door open just a crack
(Please take me away from here)
'Cause I feel like such an insomniac
(Please take me away from here)
Why do I tire of counting sheep
(Please take me away from here)
When I'm far too tired to fall asleep

To ten million fireflies
I'm weird 'cause I hate goodbyes
I got misty eyes as they said farewell

But I'll know where several are
If my dreams get real bizarre
'Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet Earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
'Cause everything is never as it seems
When I fall asleep

I'd like to make myself believe
That planet earth turns slowly
It's hard to say that I'd rather stay
Awake when I'm asleep
Because my dreams are bursting at the seams

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Honestly, i have no idea what is the reason behind this song, or what it means, it just sounds nice. been stuck in my head for a good two days. haha.

relive the magic!

2009-12-03T11:20:00.005+08:00

relieve the magic at home kids! yes i took screenshots, this way, even if she decides to delete those comments, she can't run away from these screen shots.

for anyone who wants to know the full story, read below and enjoy.

desperados LOL

2009-12-03T10:09:00.002+08:00

its safe to say, may (yes i am using her name, im not gonna care about her feelings, becasue she doesnt deserve protection) is an extremely nosy, vulgar, useless, desperate to be a wanna be, person.

so she started cussing at shawn, when he told christina to remove a comment she made on my facebook wall which really was just a kickmewhenimdown statement.

yeah, what the hell right.

so we had over an hour of a "conversation" about it, in which she is soo desperate to insult me, without actually having anything solid to insult me about. thus she used childish, immature curse words hoping to hurt me. obviously, it didn't work. i was amused in fact, that anyone can be so brainless. haha.

she got even more desperate until she tried to say fake things on the blog, like me and shawn fondling in school. either she has no idea what that word means, she is blind, or she is desperate to make people's opinions of my change, because i can tell you, that statement she made, is fake.

honestly how low can she go right?

even lower.

my friend, abby, intervened wanting to protect me, and may, with all her jealousy how i have someone else who loves me, started cussing at her too, eventhough abby didn't do anything wrong. me and abby were even harder at this fact.

basically, me and abby gang raped her, so she decided to "close" the arguement, with more swear words of course. lol. obviously she was hurting and sore from all that.

and though the thing she made me think that christina actually knew what was going on, saying how christina was sad, boo hoo hoo. guess what? i smsed christina, and she didn't know a damn thing.

of course, i do believe christina has more of a brain than to believe may, but you know what, may didn't even tell her she was defending her, oh is she going to get a laugh when she sees what may posted. hahahha.

eva also posted a comment on the wall, sadly, she only came online once the whole thing was over, eva is really a bitch (self proclaimed on at that) and could have said some reeeeeaaalllyyyyy nasty stuff. oh wellies.

haha. oh, but really, who would people believe? a girl who has neat tied up non-dyed hair, skirt over her knees, have a clean diciplinary slate, or someone who has pink highlighted hair, skirt halfway up her thighs, and constantly pons school.

again. LOL.

CWC BBQ

2009-12-01T00:20:00.005+08:00

we may not be called the creative writing chefs, but we very well could be!

okay.. so the pork chops were a little salty.. and the chicken was sometimes uncooked, and the food was occassionally covered in flecks of soot, but still. the food was pretty darn good for people who have like zero cooking experience. (not counting timothy's runescape cooking)

after all the trouble with the planning, the creative writing circle barbeque can be definitely considered a success.

Anyway, I bought a whole bunch of bbq stuff and reached samuel's house at 12.45. i was the earliest. checked out the bbq pit then went to his house, which was full of boxes, he is moving house soon. shortly after, tim arrived and set up his laptop (HAXXORS). then shawn came with the raw chicken and sausages.

I played a little bit of F.E.A.R 2, and realised, i suck at first person shooter games, especially if it is on the computer. epic fail. i'll stick to my RPGs.

So anyway, we left samuels hosue eventually, and took a bus to bukit timah plaza where we had lunch at KFC, sarah met us, then we bought a whole bunch of foodstuffs (and other stuffs) for our barbeque. hm lets see... we bought chocolate first... then marshmallows, biscuits.. charcoal.. drinks... went downstairs, got cherry tomatoes (the first box i picked up actually had its contents spill out >.<

went back to sam's house, put all the needed-to-be-placed-in-the-fridge stuff in the fridge, then went to slack some more. eventually, we prepared the food. first, it was wrapping the bacon around the cherry tomatoes and skewering it all together. we all agreed that the bacon smelt like heaven. it was some honey maple flavoured bacon. instantly, we regretted not buying another packet of it. after that was done, we took out the pork chops and coated it with the garlic salt and steak seasonings. I kid you not, timothy completely CRUSTED his pork chops with the seasonings. we all agreed he was going to get hypertension first (although eventually, all the pork chops came out a little too salty, but it tasted sooo good) we also made the pork chops holey. *pokepokepoke*. after that, prawn peeling time. shawn was teaching me how to peel the prawns, take off the legs first then remove the shell. sarah took out the heads. heh. after they were thoughly peeled and decapitated, a little wash, then to tim who massaged them with sambal chilli. then we popped everything into the fridge. lauren came eventually with eclaires and chips :)

we went down to the barbeque pit, had to go back to the house because we forgot the most important thing, the charcoal and fire starters. we took a table from the poolside and pulled it into the bbq area. got some chairs too. tried to start the fire, the others bought ice for the drinks. oh. we took like 3 hours to get a decent fire started (which we did, eventually) cheng heng came eventually too. attempted to light a fire with deoderant and a lighter. didn't work. tried oil too, it didnt create a fire, just a hell lot of smoke.

may continue the post another time. just not now.

you deserve to die jeannel, you don't deserve him and his kindness

500 soon

2009-11-26T01:47:00.002+08:00

We went out just now in my brother's car. 2nd hand Nissan Sunny. Not too bad actually. First he drove to his school, then my school, then we went to buy some food and came home. My dad was sitting next to him the whole time and me and my mom sat in the back. I fell asleep half way. haha.

My mom said it was so weird seeing him sitting there driving. Then I told her about how I remembered when we were kids (he was maybe 3~4 years old), my dad would put my bro on his lap(his tummy wasn't that big before) and let my brother touch the wheel, and they'd drive around the empty carpark in the middle of the night. Back then, multi story carparks were scarce, yes, it was a flat road. Its just so cute, isn't it? No he is no longer sitting on my dad's lap (which is actually impossible right now, for more reasons than one), but he is driving the car all by himself. Across highways, on top hills, through sharp bends... Time just flies doesn't it?

I'll admit, I was pretty nervous when I first stepped into the car, but after a while the worry just smoothed out by itself. My brother is not a bad driver, really.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, I was looking through blogs and noticed that I probably have one of the longest running ACTIVE blogs on the internets. Started in February 2005. In a couple more posts, I would have hit 500 posts. Wow. Okay maybe not that much an achievement, after all, I had nearly 5 years, but hey, it does say something right?

Of course my blog has undergone many skin changes as well as name changes. But some things which remain constant is the tagboard, the content, and the writer. Oh and of course, the blog itself.

500 is still alot of posts, and this skin has been around for quite a while. So I was thinking, maybe its time for a change? This time, I think I can make it look nicer, (although I still think this skin is really nice) I mean, now I know how to use gimp, and gimp brushes, so I don't have to solely rely on CSS anymore.

So.. Should I?

Epiphany

2009-11-25T22:25:00.002+08:00

I know this is already on my facebook, but it really is relavent. While having "lunch" with Seow, Edric, Meng Meng and Theo today, i had an epiphany. (they were talking about how Edric was considering floorball/rugby to be in a team sport, basically saying that shooting is an individual sport and not a team sport, however, I find that it is completely not true.

The common misconception of "shooting is not a team sport" is completely false, in reality, shooting requires a ton of team work, not only to bring up the over all team score, but to give each other tips, encourage one another, care for one another, wait for one another to finish training before going home, even if we have to wait for hours, and hang out after that, not only for lunch, but to really hang out These simple things really brings up one's morale, and we won't feel so drained after training because we know we would be having fun.
Not to even mention going to the range together and having fun even before training.

I realise now why my shooting standard has gone down so much after I left IJ, I have no more team behind me, something to spur me on, give me the drive to want to give my all for the team.

And of course, currently, the word "team" is non-existant in ACJC Shooting. I am really not kidding. For one, most of the people actually do not turn up for training *coughelessercaptaincoughmaycough*. Secondly, we don't even do very much to show any bonding, well I tried, at the start of the year, but of course, they picked someone else instead of me to be captain despite all the effort I put in, yes I know I sound like a sore loser, but I have good reason to be. I put in my all for the team before they picked the leaders, and they chose someone who was a frequent skipper of trainings who has no previous experience in leadership as the captain, instead of me. Ok scratch that, it didn't even have to be me, it could have been someone else whom I think would be a much better captain, but no, apparently they decided to choose by academic results (yes, the person they picked is in the top science class).

Coming back to my point, the only "bonding" we ever did was during "Physical Training" and camp. Of course, that was a total failure, at least for the girl's rifle team. only half the team came for the camp. So, how were we supposed to do very much bonding then? Oh, physical training was also fail, explanation is almost the same as camp. And you know what, I really tried to bond with them, but they were SO unresponsive.

Yes, so they are frequent "pon-ers" of training as well. And even if they come, it is the same routine. Reach, Shoot, Leave. "Lunch" is almost a myth, especially for the girls team, scratch that, ONLY for the girls team. And yes, in the end, I end up the only girl eating with the guys, pretty sad isn't it? And thats just it! We eat lunch, then go straight home. No diverting to some arcade or a movie or anything, just, home.

Could a CCA really be any LESS bonded? I mean come on, the Creative Writing Circle is a much smaller CCA, with meetings very few and far between, and yet we're having a barbeque on Monday! I don't even need to say the fact that the IJ shooters have at very least one barbeque or meet up each year, including past shooters. Although we are a smaller group, at least our group consists of pistolers as well. Yes, we know each other for over three years now, but the outings started even before the first half year was up. So take that.

Which comes to my next point. Not only do we not interact within a weapon group, we don't interact between groups as well! There is very little mix between the pistolers and the riflers. I don't even want to talk about this point.

I mean seriously, if you don't feel any connection to the team, how would you expect yourself to be able to give anything? I mean, you wouldn't care about letting them down, they don't mean very much to you after all, so what is the point?

My point is, the reason I haven't been doing well these months is because I can safely say I hate my team. Okay maybe not Shanti, and Jane(but she isn't even training anymore), but the rest of them. Okay one of them I used to find quite nice, but after she mixed with the other one she just became horrible. And here is my next point. Because I hate them, I would not give my best for them. I don't care to help them get a medal, I don't need it (come on, i've been winning medals every single year since I started shooting, and its multiple medals a year.) I don't want to bring them glory, so why should I?

So my post is exactly what I said it would be, a rant about how shooting really is a team sport, and not an individual one. Oh you poor misguided souls. I think I will put a much needed full stop to this wall of text.

bored

2009-11-24T21:20:00.001+08:00

bored. somebody save me

2009-11-12T00:00:00.001+08:00

A month since we got together..

I love you Shawny <3

an ASS of U not ME

2009-11-08T23:28:00.003+08:00

seriously, lesser c_____n, even lesser tic.

ASSUME that i have a "special training schedule" because i have a different coach. HELLO?? i'll still be at htns, wtf is with not telling me the school's training schedule?? and especially, DONT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS!! FUCKING ASK ME.

you really made an ASS-of U- but not ME.

knn. i already don't feel like part of the team and come do this kind of thing to me.

seriously, if any of you freaking dare to give me a shift for open house, i will scream in your face. you don't treat me as part of the team, so i won't do it. i have better things to do. like help out the booth of a CCA which actually treats me like a part of them.

Dolls and Marionettes

2009-11-07T11:11:00.002+08:00

Dolls and Marionettes (title to be revised)

~Prelude~

All she ever wanted was to be a model, beautiful, adored, to see herself in the situation, it was her dream. But it was something he could not give to her, not even in her death bed.

As he looked at her once beautiful face, now full of scars, tears started to roll down his cheeks. It was an attack, one that mutilated her face and body. He had wanted to spend his life with her, but now, even that is not possible. He had to leave now, the undertaker had to take her body back to his studio to prepare her for the funeral.

As he walked out of the door he just knew he couldn't leave without a part of her. He went back into the room and asked the undertaker if he could have a lock of her hair. The burly man took a pair of scissors out of his pocket and snipped off a thick lock of her hair and passed it to the man.

"Treasure your memories", the undertaker told him as he left.

The funeral was held two days later. The man had a package in his hands, which he brought up to the casket where she lay, so still, so dead. Despite the lacerations on her face, she was beautiful to him, this girl whom he loved so much. He opened the package, inside was a beautiful doll made of resin, slightly flexible, incredibly beautiful.

He held the doll and talked to the corpse, "I made her for you, my love, in your perfect image. It was my project for the past year, I was to give it to you on your birthday... But now i will never have the chance. The lock of your hair which I took from the undertaker, I used it to make the hair of this doll. Now I will always have a part of you with me, forever.". He was crying as he said this, tears which fell on the face of his love.

As he walked out of the building, he held the doll firmly in his hands, unknowing that on the face of the doll, tears also rolled down in flawless, plastic face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just felt like writing this... yup... well, possible a new story? a side project from AOEW. give me your comments :)

2009-11-06T22:41:00.001+08:00

the night sky cries, its wails deep within its eyes; the stars.
but when the heavens are not clouded by worry and sorrow,
only the stars remain.
i'd wonder and ask the stars
"when would i be able to be spectator to such beauty and perfection all day?"
they'd reply that their only perfect in my eyes..
Then their lights point me further east, and eastward my heart went
i would have flown blindly into the trecherous seas alone
if those stars didnt fnid me
again i thought i would be talking to myself as i saw those diamonds
how would i have known that as the blue moon shone on me,
those precious gems were talking back to me.
and thats when my heart swore it skipped a beat.
one day i'd definitely ask you
"would you marry me?"

doesnt get any better than this

2009-11-03T23:04:00.003+08:00

it doesnt get any better than this.

PROMOTED PROMOTED PROMOTED PROMOTED PROMOTED PROMOTED! :D

YESSSSS me and shawny have been promoted (as well as almost of our other friends haha)

i can't tell you how worried i was the past couple months.

but its finally come to the end of the year (nearly)

AND WE'RE PROMOTED! YEAH! not advanced. PROMOTED! ^.^

can finally play games without a guilty conscience. haha.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

created a new neopets acc with shawn. xD haha. AmoureuxdeChaton.

yay!

2009-11-02T22:25:00.003+08:00

went out with shawny today! <3>took neoprints for the first time in like 2 years (or more) haha.

Also, since im not 18, i can't buy this. so... DADDY!!! BUY THIS FOR ME FOR CHRISTMAS CAN? ONLY $10!!!

watched Coraline today.. not a bad show actually, but a bit creepy. lol. but ok la. not really scary. just creepy as hell.

2009-10-31T23:18:00.002+08:00

~~~~~~WARNING!!!!~~~~~~~

The following post contains explicit content as well as extremely strong language, if you are offended by this please do not scroll down, and I would also suggest you clicking the big button with the X at the top right hand corner of your screen. Thank you very much and have a nice day.

Also, I would like to remind everyone that this is my blog and I am allowed to post whatever I want on it. Thank you for your cooperation.

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I am quite pissed off at some people.

Firstly, i used to quite like PRINCESS, but then since she started hanging out with the psycho (M) and the whore (E), she has gotten more and more F-ked up. seriously i just see her attitude at some parts of the day, and the vids on fb. omg =.=

Secondly, PEOPLE WHO CAME LATE FOR THE PARTY. LIKE SUPER LATE.
especially the tramp (E). omg la. first say come at 11am. then after that say that you go collect passport (yah fucking right). a whole bloody month to collect the passport and you choose on this day which you KNOW is SO important to a supposedly "very good friend" of yours. wtf. then after that meet boyfriend liao dunno disappear to where, end up coming at like 6.pm. i don't think you went to collect your passport at all. you probably went to some hotel (*coughHotel81cough*) to go screw that "boy"friend of yours.
Seriously, damn responsible and capable "captain"

Next, OMG. WTF IS UP WITH THOSE VIDEOS?! DOING THOSE KIND OF THING WITH ALL YOUR RELATIVES AROUND??? I MEAN JUST LETTING YOUR "FRIENDS" DO IT?! WTF? ARE YOU ASKING FOR TROUBLE MY FRIEND?
And to the psycho and the whore, WTF IS UP WITH YOU PEOPLE? YOU ARE JUST BEGGING TO GET THE POOR DELUDED GIRL INTO TROUBLE!

oh right, it doesn't affect you, they aren't your parents after all. so why should you care right?

get some TACT idiots. I think its now for sale next to the "MORALS" isle at "values-r-us"

Lastly. Princess. HOW COULD YOU BE SO FUCKING SOFT? ARE YOU THAT HARD-UP FOR FRIENDS?
You're so called "friends" totally betrayed you today la, with their fucking bad attitude, thinking they own the place. THEY FREAKING WALK ALL OVER YOU! When they not here you angry angry say they pissed you off, say tell them they don't need come liao. Then when they come already you "forgive" them. Letting them off so lightly. you can call me vengeful but seriously, wtf. these people aren't worth to be called friends la.

Also, the last thing i wanted to say, i noticed that today there were only people from your CCA, and friends of those people who showed up. im kind of wondering what happened to all your other friends?

For some reason, im really not surprised. after all, S is also getting more and more irritable of you, it wasn't like that before, only when you started hanging out with the psycho and the tramp.

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*hyperventilates*

william...

2009-10-26T20:23:00.004+08:00

I will not kick a man when he is down. because there can be alot more which can be said...
promises which were never fufilled
But im glad you have learnt your lesson...
Do you remember Swensens?
thanks for your well wishes...
but this time..
what i needed to say were pretty much already said here before.... which im sure you never read.
"If you get there before I do..
Good luck in school.. and for other things... Jia You.
give up on me..." Ironically thats the song which played after i posted this

Theophihi's laptop

2009-10-26T09:39:00.002+08:00

Abusing Theophilus's laptop now :D \

Im supposed to be doing our powerpoint slides :X

saturdaayy

2009-10-25T21:05:00.002+08:00

cake cake cake cake cake
i love cake :D
had 2 types of cake last night when i went out with shawny :D Chocolate Indulgence and Butterscotch pecan.
darn sweet but soooo good. haha.
"i nw finally understand... i was wrong.... veri veri wrong..."
we were both craving for cake the day before, so we settled to go eat it :D then yesterday we both realised we had a craving for takoyaki when we were at paragon, so we went to buy that too. xD
seriously, can somebody say affinity? =3
"nw is too late... time to change.... move on... (vV JvJ)"
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GOOD LUCK TO ALL MY HONEYS TAKING THEIR O LEVELS! I KNOW YOU GUYS STARTED ON THURSDAY BUT STILL! ALL THE BEST YEA? JYJY!
I saw that, and im glad to know you remember me
Sharon is sosososo sweet, aw. made the seniors a video. haha. i really miss those girls, hope to meet up with them soon, last time i saw them was like, during NTU shoot? :O
But of course, now its far too late
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Really, did you really have to see me with another guy
FUN O RAMA XX TICKETS! BUY FROM ME PEOPLE!! xD have to sell alot yes!
to realise what you lost?

2009-10-16T20:32:00.001+08:00

update: just talked to yi lei. hes gonna be fine.

・・・ﾍyilei・ﾅ・ｷ says:
Hrmm i'm pretty fine.
It should be alright in a few days.
Doc said that my cornea was like shattered glass, hence the foggy vision
And i had some iris inflamation thingy.
(@.@)O-("o,) ☜♥☞JëÅnÑ€£☜♥☞ ci++ÿ Jüß€ãTê® says:
oic... but it will heal up right?
・・・ﾍyilei・ﾅ・ｷ says:
Good news is that it'll be back to normal.

2009-10-16T20:23:00.000+08:00

awww gareth actually has a heart! somewhere in that body

Gareth says:
In light of the bacchalaureate service and the sentimentality that has clotted up in my decrepit black blood-pump, I'd like to say that It's been a pleasure and a privilege to have you in the CWC, and that I have the fullest confidence that it will prosper under Kimberly's, Timothy's and your able leadership. I personally believe you to be a capable, intelligent individual and ultimately regret my
own inability to have you enrolled in CCAAB. Nevertheless, I am confident that you will evolve into your roles and enact them with responsibility and compassion as is necessary. I would thus consider it a privilege if we could continue to correspond in the days, months and years ahead. I wish you well for your senior year and your own 'A' levels, which are closer than you may think, and everything
else after that.
(@.@)O-("o,) ☜♥☞JëÅnÑ€£☜♥☞ ci++ÿ Jüß€ãTê® says:
awwwwwwww
thats soooo swwweeeeeeeet gareth has a heart
thanks we won't disappoint you
Gareth says:
I'm confident that you won't.

ACGAMES

2009-10-16T19:20:00.002+08:00

1SC7 (my class) is damn awesome please. 6 games for ACGames, soccer, captains ball, contact bridge, frisbee, floorball and human checkers.

guess what, 34 classes in my level, and my class won 3 OF THE 6 FREAKING GAMES. CHAMPIONS! :D soccer, bridge and checkers were ours xD freaking awesome can.

i was the instructor for human checkers, and honestly i thought i was going to lose the last match cause i made a very very stupid mistake which cost us a double eat. but guess what, my opponent made a worse mistake, i had 2 double eats, and the most "finishing" move (the one which before he made the mistake i thought i would have lost) moved the piece (miyuki) and ate up a king and another piece. *evil laugh* damn lucky please.

i think i was quite lucky today because a few of my opponents made silly mistakes.

2nd opponent was timothy kwok. nice friendly game. the one after that was with AD3 (wasit?) but yeah, that guy was really friendly and came to praise me. lol. said i was good. friendly person. yup :)

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poor yi lei got hit in the eye when the floorball ball "jumped" straight at him due to overcrowding of violent people. his vision in that eye became fuzzy. bad so much that he could only see sillhouetes, not even colours. gotta pray for him man.. :\

2009-10-12T10:43:00.003+08:00

so he did think of me.... even if it was in the slightest way....

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im lucky im in love with my best friend.

11th October, 9.53 pm. he "proposed".

Shawn Lau Wai Hung. i love you, and yes, i will be your girl.

2009-10-03T21:40:00.003+08:00

Your Love is Just a Lie
by Simple Plan

I fall asleep by the telephone
It's 2 O'clock and I'm waiting up alone
Tell me where have you been?

I found a note with another name
You blow a kiss, but it just don't feel the same
Cause I can feel that you're gone

I can't bite my tongue forever
While you try to play it cool
You can hide behind your stories
But don't take me for a fool

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know Your love is just a lie (Lie)
It's nothing but a lie (Lie)

You look so innocent
But the guilt in your voice gives you away
Yeah you know what I mean

How does it feel when you kiss when you know that i trust you
And do you think about me when he fucks you?
Could you be more obscene?

So dont try to say you're sorry
Or try to make it right
Don't waste your breath because it's too late, it's too late.

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know,Your love is just a lie (Lie)
It's nothing but a lie (Lie)
You're nothing but a lie

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know Your love is just a lie (Lie)
I know you're nothing but a lie(Lie)
Lie(Lie)
Lie(Lie)
Lie
Your love is just a lie

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i just realised i only ever heard this song on the radio. never know it was "fucks" in there. lol. radio version is "touches". hm. interesting.

and yes. it is the newest song on my playlist.

promos in 3 days. JYJY.

2009-09-27T13:05:00.001+08:00

Listening to songs makes me think..

i have alot of ideas for AOEW...

i already have an ending.....

if i ever reach it. ;P

MCR- Cemetary Drive

2009-09-27T12:57:00.002+08:00

Cemetary Drive
By My Chemical Romance

This night, walk the dead
In a solitary style
And crash the cemetery gates.
In the dress your husband hates

Way down, mark the grave
Where the search lights find us
Drinking by the mausoleum door
And they found you on the bathroom floor

I miss you, I miss you so far
And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

Back home, off the run
Singing songs that make you slit your wrists
It isn't that much fun, staring down a loaded gun

So I won't stop dying, won't stop lying (are you there at all?)
If you want I'll keep on crying (do you care at all?)
Did you get what you deserve? (are you there at all?)
Is this what you always want me for?

I miss you, I miss you so far
And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

Way down, way down
Way down, way down
Way down, way down
Way down, way down

I miss you, I miss you so far
And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard

When will I miss you, when will I miss you so far
And the collision of your kiss that made it so hard
Made it so hard

Way down, way down
Way down, way down
Way down, way down
Way down, way down
Way... down...

2009-09-21T18:08:00.001+08:00

Why do my days have to be marred by the thoughts of you?

2009-09-11T11:48:00.002+08:00

Wow. How could I have felt so guilty? I had no reason to be. You never did love me anyway, W.

You claimed you did. Acted like it too i suppose. But you really didn't did you? I suppose you did at the start, or maybe you were just trying to humor me, by making an effort to find me when I needed you? Actually caring about what I did, what happened to me?

But then you stopped caring. The more I think, the more I realise you really didn't love me at all. You didn't bother to sacrifice any time to find me, rather playing games. I did. I sacrificed so much to be with you, and you didn't care. I am not even going to bother to write the material side because I didn't really care about that then, it stings a little but I still don't.

And also, you never, never, NEVER, defended me. When I was jealous about _. When we had a little tiff, you defended _, but not me, what is up with that??? You're own girlfriend! When people bullied me, you said you would do something about it, but didn't in the end because you didn't see the point in it or something. USELESS. You know what? Even the last "anniversary" of ours. You knew I was thinking about breaking up with you. You knew. You tried to defend, tried to deny. But despite that, our last "anniversary" month. Not even a text message. Nothing. In fact, you went to the beach with your friends. And you didn't have the curtesy to tell me. Useless.

You never even bothered to support me. When I complained to you, no sympathy at all. When I asked you to support me at competitions you didn't bother, you just couldn't wake up for me. Not even a call. Occassionally an sms that was either too late or too early.

The crappiest thing is, I did love you. I put in so much into our relationship. Sacrificed so much for you. Time, money, sanity, risking my friends, risking family, everything. Eventually I let myself live a little. I deserved so much more. I was told, "you don't have to feel guilty, if he cannot even make you happy, if all he does is make you sad, its not worth it, you deserve so much more." I loved you to the end, and I know I still love you now, stupid as it may seem. "First love is unforgettable" were you first love? Or an illusion? God knows. I don't even know who my "first love" is. You, or Ignatius, maybe none of you, even.

I was just so stupid.

I blame myself. You didn't even like me in the start. I was the one who liked you, told you. You just went along "to make my happy" You said eventually you loved me, but now... I really doubt that.

2009-09-08T10:55:00.001+08:00

boy: *smells girl's hair* i dont mind trading my oxygen for this
girl: you need oxygen to live silly!
boy: i need you to live.
how can i give up a part of my soul?

2009-09-06T01:20:00.005+08:00

birthday over.

guess i can say i was pretty bored throughout the day.

i like the days before and after my birthdays. but i realised i havent actually liked the day of my birthday in a while.

last year my parents scolded me cause... ah long story. i spent it with him... but...

for a sweet 16, it wasn't very sweet.

the year before that... *sigh* stupidly i spent it crying over [s]some guy.[/s]

won't even bother remembering the ones before that.

today was spent, at tuition with tio-feelers, then extremely bored with my family.

kinda made me remember why i hate my birthday.

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the 4th of september was good though, great even.

the morning it was spent in school, teachers day celebrations. performances were... pretty okay i guess.

after the celebrations. my class (or whatever didnt skip school) went to the canteen. they got us a cake! deborah's birthday is on the 4th, mine is 5th. rocky joined in too cause his birthday is on the 17th. (our entire PW group minus theofifi has our birthdays in september). it was the 3 of us blowing the candles off a heart shaped super chocolatey cake. nomnomnom. the 3 of us were holding the knife with like 2 fingers each LOL. (technically 1 finger and 1 thumb)

the guys carried rocky to some metal thing, like spread his legs at it and tried to bang his crotch into the metal thing. kinda failed cause the metal thing broke. =.=. i think they got his thighs tho. he was walking like it hurt. poor rocky >.<

my classmates are really so awesome. the so called "clique", at the start of the year i really doubted my class, i couldn't find my clique. i remember talking to dennis, and he told me that i would find my clique eventually, and i think i have. im glad i didn't give up. anyway, here is the present they gave me. its so awesome. its a big glass bottle filled with sweets and signed by everyne. its so sweet, literally. i love it.

christina gave me this pouch with some erasers inside.. haha. its super cute too. didnt take a picture of it >.<

i knew you were disappointed that day

i went home, bathed, then went to meet shawn at marina square. he went there earlier to "prepare stuff" which i kept guessing the whole day but didnt get it right until we actually reached the place at night.

i'll never let that happen again

first, we went to sakae sushi to have our lunch! haha... ate alot.. @.@... well... alot for us, we were both very full after lunch. the bill was like $40+

after that we rotted a while then went to watch a movie. we watched G Force, ITS SO FREAKING CUTE!!! i love the mice!!! xD should watch it. its extremely cute.

we had alot of time. lol. shawn's planning is seriously off. went to suntec... walked around.. then went back to marina square.. secret recipe for dinner.. i sat down at a table then he went to "get the menu"

he came back... then we looked through the menu.... my back was facing the counter... then he took my menu away... and from behind a waiter came with a slice of cake with a candle on it.

the waiter went to get a lighter and i know i was smiling alot.... aww....

he sang happy birthday for me... i really like his singing voice. i mean yeah i know he can sing, he was from choir but really aw....

i mean, its not only cause we were like the only 2 people at the place, but i really felt like we were the only 2 people there...

we shared a plate of spaghetti cause we were both full. haha...

after that... the usual. haha... he gave me a present... a 300 piece puzzle ^.^ its already finished meow~

oh i did my nails today, DIY! :D long story lol.

Lust, Women and shooting blanks

2009-08-23T21:16:00.003+08:00

Lust, Women and shooting blanks
by Shawn Lau Wai Hung

I see her glow in the dimly lit room. It’s time. I quicken my pace as my heart races. I pick her up as I survey her body. My eyes scan her beige body from her top to bottom and up again. It is beyond my physical capability to resist her curves. My heartbeat resonates in my ears as I pull her nearer and closer to my body. Being this close to her, I get a whiff of the all too familiar scent which I have craved since the first time I held her. I want to relive that moment again, save the hesitation. I slide my hands lower and traced her curves as I pull her even closer and lift her. I put her gently on the table and I cocked her. I slid it in as I carried her with ease. Perspiration did not slow me down as my breaths became shorter. I looked into her eyes, an intense moment. Finally, I pulled the trigger and my rifle propelled the pellet at top speed. Darn, I missed and shot a blank.

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seriously, who ROFLed after reading that? :P thats his piece for CWC. our this weeks theme is lust :P